"And now it looks like I'm probably going to shoot a movie that I wrote. I got the money to do it, and I would star and all, because of being on Howard." -- Artie Lange
Arthur Steven "Artie" Lange, Jr. (born October 11, 1967) is an American actor, comedian, radio personality and author. Lange is most notable for replacing Jackie Martling on The Howard Stern Show, and for being an original cast member of the sketch comedy series MADtv. Lange co-wrote a book with Anthony Bozza, titled Too Fat to Fish. It was released on November 11, 2008, and debuted at number one on the New York Times best-seller list on November 21, 2008.
"A weekend in Vegas without gambling and drinking is just like being a born-again Christian.""Artie is going to do what ever Artie wants to do.""By the time I am Howard's age I hope to be long retired. I don't plan on working that long.""Everytime I go to Vegas, I seem to incur some kind of fine.""Have you ever Googled yourself? I did, most depressing thing ever. People have websites hoping I die at 38.""I am not the easiest guy to live with. It is probably the lack of stability in my life.""I have been in a lot of movies, but none of them are critics' darlings, you might say.""I was at Yankee Stadium one time at 5 a.m., but that was to buy angel dust.""I'm not going to lie to you fellas, I've been drinking.""It is funny because the guy who is my boss now, Howard Stern, has a similarity there. He got big being a regular guy. He wasn't the greatest looking guy in the world.""Of course in show business there are two ways to play it and I am not politically correct so I am not going to get endorsements or anything like that.""The point of drinking in moderation is that sometimes you don't drink in moderation.""The regular guy still relates to him and Howard is a $500 million guy now who dates a model and drives about in a limo all day. But Howard still knows how to make a plumber laugh and those guys still have him on in the morning, because he is a real talent.""Vegas means comedy, tragedy, happiness and sadness all at the same time.""When I black out, it's the happiest time of my life.""When I got on Stern I realized that this was the one job where you could be really honest and open, almost like Richard Pryor or something. You can be honest about your life and get laughs.""Whiskey will always be a part of my life."
Lange was born on October 11, 1967, in Livingston Township, New Jersey, and raised in Union Township. His mother Judy (née Caprio), was a secretary while his father Arthur Sr., was a general contractor. Two weeks after he was born, his father went on trial for counterfeiting money, but was spared jail time out of the court's sympathy for his young son. His family identified themselves as Italian-Americans. During a segment of The Howard Stern Show, Lange provided a blood sample which was taken to a laboratory for DNA testing. The results indicated that Lange was 25 percent American Indian. Lange said that his father's background was a "grey area."
During high school, he excelled in baseball, becoming an All County third baseman, and spent his free time working with his father. On October 18, 1985, his father fell from a ladder and broke his back, becoming quadriplegic. Money soon became an issue within his family, and celebrities were contacted to donate items for them to auction. Howard Stern was the only one to respond, and sent them an autographed jacket. When talking about the donation on the air, Stern said, "Does this guy think that if he puts the jacket on he's going to walk again?" which Lange's father found funny. His father died from an infection on February 1, 1990, four-and-a-half years after the accident.
In August 1985, Lange was arrested for attempted bank robbery. He claimed he was trying to flirt with the teller by passing her a note that said he was armed and demanded $50,000. The teller took it seriously, triggering a silent alarm. He was charged with disorderly conduct and entered community service in March 1986. As part of his probation, Lange attended the Connecticut School of Broadcasting from March to June 1987, as well as Seton Hall University for a short time. On July 12, 1987, at age 19, Lange performed his first stand-up comedy routine at The Improv in Hell's Kitchen, Manhattan. From February 1991 to September 1992, he stayed in New Jersey and took up work as a longshoreman to help support his family. He eventually quit his job to focus full time on his comedy career.
In 1995, Lange landed a role as one of the original cast members of FOX's sketch comedy show MADtv. Lange had previous sketch comedy experience with the improv troupe "Live on Tape". Lange later attributed his hiring to the fact that he fit the John Belushi mold that was popular in sketch comedy. His most popular recurring character on the show was "That's My White Mama".
Among his impersonations on the show were Ed Harris, Ed McMahon, F. Lee Bailey, George Clooney, Joe Pesci, Larry Csonka, Newt Gingrich, Richard Karn, Roseanne Barr, Rosie O'Donnell, and Yasser Arafat.
Lange stated that his most degrading point of cocaine use occurred during a shooting of the MADtv sketch "Babewatch" (a parody of Babe and Baywatch), in which he played Babe the pig as a lifeguard. Because the sketch involved going through hours of make-up so as to transform the comedian into a pig, he snorted cocaine in his car in full pig make-up during a break in the shooting of the sketch. Upon returning from the shoot, he passed out in his hotel room, awakening to find he had defecated in his bed. The cast and fanbase of The Howard Stern Show now refer to this incident as "The Pig Story." During the second season of MADtv, his stint with the show came to a dramatic end. After a cocaine binge, cast and crew members attempted to have an intervention for him. Lange fled the studio running through streets and backyards with his co-workers chasing after him. The chase ended in a supermarket, where he was arrested. Lange attempted to punch one of the police officers. He was sentenced to time served and probation. Lange began psychiatric counseling and inpatient drug rehabilitation. However, the producers decided not to renew his contract for a third season.
Lange would make cameo appearances on MADtv during the fifth and tenth seasons, including the final episode on FOX on May 16, 2009. He also appeared on MADtv's rival show, Saturday Night Live, on the same day hosted by former SNL castmember Will Ferrell.
Dirty Work and The Norm Show (1998—2001)
After Lange served a short jail term and a drug rehabilitation program, comedian Norm MacDonald, impressed by Lange's work on Mad TV, offered him a part in the 1998 movie Dirty Work. Lange credits MacDonald and director Bob Saget with rejuvenating his comedy career, leading to several more film appearances and a lucrative television development deal. He then joined the cast of MacDonald's sitcom The Norm Show during its second season, staying until its cancellation the following year. Lange has since described this period as a personal high point, but a creative low point; he enjoyed being paid $35,000 an episode, sleeping late, and being in healthy physical shape as well as working amongst the cast, particularly with MacDonald, and Laurie Metcalf. However, he disliked the show itself, referring to the material as "ridiculously lame, easy jokes."
The Howard Stern Show (2001)
Lange was introduced to The Howard Stern Show by his father in 1982. Following the departure of Jackie Martling, the show's head writer for 15 years in March 2001, Stern announced a "Win Jackie's Money" contest, where various comedians would audition for Martling's seat by sitting in during shows. Those who sat in included Craig Gass, Doug Stanhope, Richard Jeni, Jim Florentine and Ron Zimmerman. After the cancellation of The Norm Show in April, Lange would sit in for a number of shows between May and October, before beginning full time on October 26, 2001. Since Lange joined the show, Stern has often teased him for his eating habits, gambling, drinking, drug use, and sleeping at work. Stern also makes a point to praise Lange's comedic talents; Lange had grown up listening to the show, and was a fan to the point of being able to recall obscure details from years ago on a regular basis. Stern and his staff have commented that Lange's life is a sort of perpetual adolescence; his mother delivers food parcels and cleans his apartment, he continually gorges himself on pizza, pancakes and other fattening foods, and goes on drunken binges.
Beer League and substance abuse (2005—2008)
In early June 2005, Lange missed four days of shows, prompting concerns of a possible relapse of past substance abuse. The situation climaxed in Lange behaving strangely and belligerently on the air. On July 27, he infamously sneered at Stern and the staff, "Artie's gotta do what Artie's gotta do!" Lange then missed the next two days, writing his absence as stress from doing the radio show and filming his comedy film Artie Lange's Beer League. The truth for his absence was revealed in a spontaneous revelation on September 21, 2006, in which Lange acknowledged that he had regularly snorted heroin. He discussed past episodes of heroin use, beginning when he was a stand-up comedian and continuing until Beer League was set to begin shooting. He then detailed his painful withdrawal of the drug, which included side effects of aching, cold sweats, shaking and vomiting. Lange recalled taking his telephone off the hook to avoid speaking to his mother, who ultimately intervened to help him recover. Lange was threatened with legal action by producers of Beer League if he failed to show up for the first day of shooting, which led him to secure a home visit from a doctor who prescribed Subutex to alleviate his dependency.
In the days leading up to Stern's departure from terrestrial radio in December 2005, Lange revealed that he and show producer Gary Dell'Abate were approached by Infinity Broadcasting about replacing Stern with a show of their own. He claimed he was offered roughly $5 million to defect, but he and Dell'Abate claimed to have never given the offer much thought.
On April 10, 2008, Lange walked off the show after an on-air argument and subsequent outburst at his personal assistant, Teddy (during which, he mentioned that Teddy embarrassed him by referring to Bloomingdale's as "Bloomie's") resulting in a physical altercation. Lange expressed his disdain for his assistant of nearly two years because of recent money issues. Later in the broadcast, Lange returned to apologize, and tender his resignation, which Stern accepted.
On April 21, 2008, Lange returned to the Howard Stern Show, following a scheduled one-week vacation hiatus for the cast members. He apologized for his behavior and took full responsibility. It was revealed that Sirius was allowing him to continue, but that another infraction would end his employment. Additionally, Lange explained that despite their on-air confrontation, he and Teddy will maintain their working relationship. As of December 2008, Teddy continues to work as road manager for Artie's out-of-town comedy appearances.
Too Fat to Fish and Jack and Coke (2008—09)
On November 11, 2008, Lange's first book, Too Fat to Fish, was released. The book is a collection of narrative episodes from throughout Lange's life, from his childhood to his recent USO trip to Afghanistan in July 2008. The foreword is written by Howard Stern. The book debuted at number one on the New York Times bestseller list under hardcover non-fiction. The softcover edition was released in June 2009 with a change to the back cover from the hardcover edition, and includes a bonus chapter.
On November 17, 2009, Lange released his first-ever CD, titled "Jack and Coke" via Shout! Factory. The 80-minute set was recorded live in New York City.
Lange frequently discussed his on-again/off-again relationship with longtime girlfriend Dana Sironi of New Jersey, after they began dating in early spring 2002. Most of the couple's problems stemmed from Lange's lifestyle. In mid-2006 Lange declared that the couple had officially broken up, for which Lange cited his heroin abuse as the primary reason. However, Lange announced on an early November 2006 Stern Show that they were again together to some extent, but that the situation was a mystery even to him. The couple broke up in early 2007, but began dating again in December 2007. On January 29, 2008, Vinnie Favale, from The Late Show with David Letterman, accidentally e-mailed her the itinerary for the night of Lange's appearance. The e-mail contained the details of the reservations Favale made for Lange and three women at a hotel. The long-suffering couple have since parted ways. However, Dana accompanied Lange to an appearance on the Letterman show in March 2009.
Lange remains very close to his family, which includes his sister Stacey, a successful corporate fashion designer, MarksFriggin.com - Stern Show News - Archive and his mother Judy, who retired in March 2007 from a secretarial career. MarksFriggin.com - Stern Show News - Archive He was raised Catholic, he has said that, like Howard Stern, he sincerely doubts the existence of God but is "afraid" to identify himself as an atheist in the event that he is wrong.
Politically, he has said he does not consider himself to be a "liberal", though he is pro-choice, a supporter of gay rights (despite his notorious penchant for gay jokes), and a supporter of unions due to his former career as a longshoreman. He has called President George W. Bush a "dolt" and supported John Kerry in 2004 and Barack Obama in 2008. He initially supported the 2003 invasion of Iraq, but has since changed his mind. When documentarian Michael Moore visited The Howard Stern Show in 2007, Lange told him that he had changed some of his political opinions because of Moore's films.
His favorite book is A Confederacy of Dunces. He considers comedian George Carlin to be the all-time greatest, and immediately said "it's easy to follow the funniest guy ever" when he appeared after Carlin as a guest during his first talk show appearance on The Late Late Show with Craig Kilborn. He has been critical of the "unbelievably positive press" given to comedians such as Jon Stewart and Ricky Gervais, while acknowledging their talents, feeling that their acclaim approaches hyperbole.
On June 15, 2009, Lange made a controversial appearance on HBO's Joe Buck Live. Lange made several obscene and derogatory comments directed towards homosexuals and even to Joe Buck himself. At one point Ross Greenburg, HBO Sports President, said Lange "bordered on bad taste" with his "mean-spirited" tone. However, on the June 16, 2009 Howard Stern Show, Artie claimed Greenburg told him, "If [fellow panelists] Paul Rudd and Jason Sudeikis get boring, you go nuts." His attitude and remarks caused Joe Buck to thank Artie for being on the first and last taping of his show. Lange would soon after the show aired apologize for his behavior. HBO also issued a formal apology. Though Buck himself called it a "disaster," he made the record clear that he was not as offended as the press originally thought. The incident made TIME's list of "Top 10 Awkward Moments of 2009". Lange made a cameo appearance in the second episode of the show which aired on September 22, 2009.
Health
During a Howard Stern Show weight loss competition, Lange was the only contestant to gain weight. He has also been asked to appear on Celebrity Fit Club for each of the show's four seasons, but has declined every time, due to his commitment to "The Stern Show."
In May 2004, Las Vegas station KLAS-TV reported him dead. At the time of the announcement, they were on the air doing a live show from Las Vegas which made the call that much greater as they brought up the TV sound to the live Stern show feed for all to hear that had attended the show that day. The story turned out to be a prank executed by Stern Show regular caller Captain Janks.
The website [artielangedeathwatch.com] was started to predict when Lange would die if he continues this lifestyle. Before discontinuing updates, the site projected that he would die at age 53. Countdown The site resulted in Lange being turned down for special life insurance, when the company came across it. During the Comedy Central Roast of William Shatner in 2006, octogenarian Betty White quipped that she would outlive Lange.
After his break up with Sironi, Lange gained well over ; on March 3, 2008, it was determined on The Howard Stern Show that he had reached . When Artie turned 40 in October, 2007 he admitted that he weighed 305 pounds.[1]
Also in September 2007, Lange gave details of his experiences with sleep apnea. Lange claims that he has awoken in the middle of the night to use the bathroom and has fallen asleep while sitting on the toilet.
Lange was tested by Jon Hein for Type-2 diabetes on October 24 on The Howard Stern Show, and discovered his blood sugar was at 238. The next day on the show, Lange stated his mother took him to see a doctor and was tested for diabetes. The tests came back negative and he stated his blood pressure was normal. The doctor, however, was very concerned with the speed that Lange has gained so much weight and suggested he go on a diet to save his heart. After this incident, Lange began a moderate diet. Staff members commented that he looked "less bloated."
On November 1, 2007, Lange revealed on-air that he had taken a tablet of Subutex and was feeling slightly high. Howard insisted it was because of his new diet. Less than an hour after feeling the effects of Subutex, Lange threw two objects, one of which was a CD case, in a fit of rage at cast member Sal the Stockbroker; the two were not on speaking terms after a heated argument that they had the day before along with Richard Christy. Lange became frustrated once Sal and Richard attempted to amend the situation with an apology he found to be "phony". Lange would soon afterwards apologize to Sal, admitting that he overreacted and "crossed a line [he] never thought [he] would" and would make up with Sal and Richard one week later on November 8.
A picture on the November 7, 2007 show was revealed on air from the previous day when Lange was photographed holding a McDonald's bag and drink. Lange called in sick the next day ... blaming his "diet" for his illness ... and the cast teased him anyway.
On August 6, 2008, Lange claimed to have begun an intensive outpatient rehab program after missing the Comedy Central Roast of Bob Saget. On the August 11 airing of the show Lange admitted to having been back on heroin for the past 7 weeks. He stated that he had gotten drunk playing pool and was offered the heroin by someone at the pool-hall. Comedian Richard Lewis recommended a therapist to Lange.
Lange missed work on December 2 and 3, 2008, due to self-described "general discomfort" and "painful vomiting," causing concern that Lange was having a relapse in his heroin addiction. On December 4, Lange said his doctor believed the symptoms may be the manifestation of a bleeding ulcer.
On the December 8, 2008 show, Lange admitted that he lied about intensive outpatient rehab, and had only gone to the therapist twice, not even making it through the end of the second session. This resulted in the now-familiar fear that he was back in trouble with heroin, pills, and/or alcohol.
On the June 17, 2009, episode of The Adam Carolla Podcast, Lange revealed that he had been sober for two and a half months, had lost 45 pounds and hoped to lose 45 more.
On the August 10, 2009 broadcast of The Howard Stern Show, Stern noticed Lange's weight loss. Lange then confirmed that his current weight was 230 lb and that he wished to continue in his endeavor to lose more weight.. Lange stated that he stands about 5 feet 8 inches tall.[2]
2010 Suicide attempt
Lange began an indefinite leave from the Howard Stern Show on December 12, 2009, although no reason was given for his departure. On January 2, 2010, Lange attempted suicide by repeatedly stabbing himself in the abdomen with a 13 inch kitchen knife. He was found on the floor of his waterfront home by his mother and taken to Jersey City Medical Center where he underwent surgery and was released the following week.
Sirius XM Radio stated that Lange would be welcomed back to the Howard Stern Show following his recovery.
On September 8, 2010, Stern stated that Lange had expressed interest in telling his story on the show, although both Howard and Robin questioned if it was in his best interest to do so at that point.
On September 24, 2010, Artie returned to the comedy stage for the first time since his second suicide attempt eight months earlier. Lange performed two nights in a row at New York's "Comedy Cellar". Lange didn't go into much detail about his suicide attempt, but did mention being in a "psych ward for the past eight months".
Lange auditioned for the role of Milton in Mike Judge's film Office Space, and again for the role of Judge Hank "The Hangman" BMW in Mike Judge's film Idiocracy, he lost both roles to Stephen Root. MarksFriggin.com - Stern Show News - Archive Lange auditioned for Paul Giamatti's role in Man on the Moon. He also auditioned for the role of Nick Volpe (Wass Stevens was ultimately cast) in the 2008 film The Wrestler. During a December 18, 2008 call to The Howard Stern Show, director Darren Aronofsky, a stand-up comedy fan, stated he was impressed by Lange's acting but felt his celebrity would be distracting to the audience; Stern, who said it was his favorite movie of the year, agreed with this assessment.
Official sites
Artie Lange - Too Fat To Fish
Official Bios of Stern Show Cast, Including Artie
Interviews
Artie Lange interview on Rock 'n Roll Ghost
in 2006
in 2008
Artie Lange interview on the Best Damn Sports Show Podcast
Others
Video of Artie at Woodstock '94 - An amateur video taken of a young Lange attending Woodstock '94, he appears approximately one minute in with a cigarette up his nose, jokingly asking the cameraman for pot.