Helpful Score: 5
i read 2 chapters and hated this book, its not for attatchment parenting
Heather K. (heatherk) -
Helpful Score: 3
Ezzo is out of touch and out of date in his thinking. I think this book is dangerous and puts baby at risk for SIDs.
Cara C. (ChaseFamilyZoo) reviewed On Becoming Baby Wise: Giving Your Infant the Gift of Nighttime Sleep on + 2 more book reviews
Helpful Score: 3
I don't know why so many people dislike this book. How can letting a baby get the sleep they need to function be a bad thing?
*If you feel the need to carry your baby around 24x7, then you won't like the book. He recommends letting them sleep undisturbed. But that is not a reason to hate the man. I don't go around saying baby slings, or the books recommending them are dangerous. He has his opinion, and is allowed to.*
When I nursed like they told me in the hospital my milk supply went down. My daughter would snack and snack, then be hungry again in 30 min.
I did like he said and kept her awake to feed for half an hour, play for a while, then she would sleep well for about 2 hours or so and be ready to eat again. After that my milk supply was abundant, and I had a nice, fat (healthy) happy baby!
Nothing in this book is harmful!
He doesn't say to neglect your child, or not check on them. Perhaps people are reading out of context?
My girls are now 10 and 12. We are homeschoolers. They are very attached to me and my husband. Not warped or in any way damaged because I let them get on a natural schedule just the way Gary Ezzo suggested. In fact, both of them are very good sleepers, probably get better sleep than I do!
Cara
*If you feel the need to carry your baby around 24x7, then you won't like the book. He recommends letting them sleep undisturbed. But that is not a reason to hate the man. I don't go around saying baby slings, or the books recommending them are dangerous. He has his opinion, and is allowed to.*
When I nursed like they told me in the hospital my milk supply went down. My daughter would snack and snack, then be hungry again in 30 min.
I did like he said and kept her awake to feed for half an hour, play for a while, then she would sleep well for about 2 hours or so and be ready to eat again. After that my milk supply was abundant, and I had a nice, fat (healthy) happy baby!
Nothing in this book is harmful!
He doesn't say to neglect your child, or not check on them. Perhaps people are reading out of context?
My girls are now 10 and 12. We are homeschoolers. They are very attached to me and my husband. Not warped or in any way damaged because I let them get on a natural schedule just the way Gary Ezzo suggested. In fact, both of them are very good sleepers, probably get better sleep than I do!
Cara
Kristina T. (gracekissed) reviewed On Becoming Baby Wise: Giving Your Infant the Gift of Nighttime Sleep on + 13 more book reviews
Helpful Score: 2
I am a pediatric nurse with 10 years of experience both in hospital and primary care peds, a breastfeeding mom of a 6 month old,and a Christian. I say this because qualifications on advice matter. Gary Ezzo, the author of this book, has none besides one degree in theology, and the "co-author," Robert Bucknam, apparently only wrote the forward, and that while he was still in training. The information in this book is opinion, pure and simple, and the advice is benignly wrong in some places and dangerously wrong in others.
All quotes and references come from the 2006 edition of the book.
The book is built around 2 main logical fallacies. The "straw man" fallacy of 2 fictional babies that drive the text (pg. 18), and the either-or fallacy of Ezzo vs. everyone else. The language is extreme (Ezzo's way gives "bliss," while ignoring his advice brings "chaos"), and the supposed consequences of not following his advice are designed to promote fear (ADHD- pg.54, loss of milk supply- pg. 58, ruined marriage- pg. 22, obesity- pg. 140, academic failure- pg. 141... the list goes on.). Most of the claims have no citations, those that do often cite things like 20/20 specials, and the few actual research studies referenced are often out of date, made up by the author himself and unpublished, or misinterpreted to fit the claims of the book.
The underlying concept of the book is that parents must teach their children from day one that they are not the center of the universe, doing so by "shaping their hunger cycles" (pg. 30) and teaching them "delayed gratification" in the form of leaving them to cry, especially at nap time (pg. 140, for example). Healthy indicators of infant development are misinterpreted as pathological, the most obvious example of which is teaching that the behavior associated with a normal "separation anxiety" phase is a sign of unhealthy attachment.
While Ezzo does say to feed the baby if he is hungry sooner than the book's 2 1/2 hour minimum, he also repeats frequent warnings such as "do not deviate so often as to establish a new routine" (pg. 116). His breastfeeding advice on foremilk vs. hindmilk and "snacking" is completely incorrect physiologically. He clearly knows that educated, certified lactation consultants will disagree with him, because he issues a warning to boycott and warn others away from a consultant who tells you differently from his book (pg. 100-101). His pronouncement that NICUs are on a 3-hour feeding schedule, thust preventing Failure to Thrive (pg. 97)is so wrong that it's scary.
Most of his advice is bad, in large part, because it is developmentally inappropriate. Infants aren't capable of learning delayed gratification, but they are capable of learning that their cries go unanswered. Many infants who give up crying on this system, "flexible" though it says it is, have gone on to refuse feeds altogether, having given up hope that their cries will be answered. Hundreds of cases of Failure to Thrive have been reported around the country, where parents were following Ezzo's advice. Unsurprisingly, the American Academy of Pediatrics has issued warnings regarding scheduled feedings in general and dehydration associated with "Babywise" specifically since they organized a review board in 1998 to address the concerns of pediatricians.
I could go on. This book scares me as a nurse, and it scares me as a parent. Do your research. Look at what experts have to say. Think critically in terms of who is telling you something and what kind of education they have. Just because a book is popular doesn't make it a good resource.
All quotes and references come from the 2006 edition of the book.
The book is built around 2 main logical fallacies. The "straw man" fallacy of 2 fictional babies that drive the text (pg. 18), and the either-or fallacy of Ezzo vs. everyone else. The language is extreme (Ezzo's way gives "bliss," while ignoring his advice brings "chaos"), and the supposed consequences of not following his advice are designed to promote fear (ADHD- pg.54, loss of milk supply- pg. 58, ruined marriage- pg. 22, obesity- pg. 140, academic failure- pg. 141... the list goes on.). Most of the claims have no citations, those that do often cite things like 20/20 specials, and the few actual research studies referenced are often out of date, made up by the author himself and unpublished, or misinterpreted to fit the claims of the book.
The underlying concept of the book is that parents must teach their children from day one that they are not the center of the universe, doing so by "shaping their hunger cycles" (pg. 30) and teaching them "delayed gratification" in the form of leaving them to cry, especially at nap time (pg. 140, for example). Healthy indicators of infant development are misinterpreted as pathological, the most obvious example of which is teaching that the behavior associated with a normal "separation anxiety" phase is a sign of unhealthy attachment.
While Ezzo does say to feed the baby if he is hungry sooner than the book's 2 1/2 hour minimum, he also repeats frequent warnings such as "do not deviate so often as to establish a new routine" (pg. 116). His breastfeeding advice on foremilk vs. hindmilk and "snacking" is completely incorrect physiologically. He clearly knows that educated, certified lactation consultants will disagree with him, because he issues a warning to boycott and warn others away from a consultant who tells you differently from his book (pg. 100-101). His pronouncement that NICUs are on a 3-hour feeding schedule, thust preventing Failure to Thrive (pg. 97)is so wrong that it's scary.
Most of his advice is bad, in large part, because it is developmentally inappropriate. Infants aren't capable of learning delayed gratification, but they are capable of learning that their cries go unanswered. Many infants who give up crying on this system, "flexible" though it says it is, have gone on to refuse feeds altogether, having given up hope that their cries will be answered. Hundreds of cases of Failure to Thrive have been reported around the country, where parents were following Ezzo's advice. Unsurprisingly, the American Academy of Pediatrics has issued warnings regarding scheduled feedings in general and dehydration associated with "Babywise" specifically since they organized a review board in 1998 to address the concerns of pediatricians.
I could go on. This book scares me as a nurse, and it scares me as a parent. Do your research. Look at what experts have to say. Think critically in terms of who is telling you something and what kind of education they have. Just because a book is popular doesn't make it a good resource.
Helpful Score: 1
I have three children and this is one of the books I've consistently returned to with each baby. It has excellent advice for fostering healthy sleep habits in young babies. But if you read this book, don't follow its advice until the baby is about 2 months old. The book encourages a certain program to start WAY TOO YOUNG and it only adds to frustration of parents of newborns. You can't spoil a newborn. With my third, I just relaxed and followed the baby's lead until around 2 months then started using the Baby Wise method. Buy it, but don't become a slave to it like I did with my first. Take what works and leave the rest.
Colleen G. (matrixmom76) reviewed On Becoming Baby Wise: Giving Your Infant the Gift of Nighttime Sleep on + 16 more book reviews
Helpful Score: 1
At best it might work for an already tightly scheduled family combined with a relaxed easy going baby. I am anything but scheduled and all my children are high strung. It was completely impractical to implement. It would have required that both my children and I become people we are not created to be.
Alise W. (BigMama) reviewed On Becoming Baby Wise: Giving Your Infant the Gift of Nighttime Sleep on + 11 more book reviews
One of the worst parenting books on the market. Please, please do not follow this man's advice. He has no training and no credentials. Has a strong possibility of harming a nursing relationship and creating false guilt with new parents.
For much more information on Mr. Ezzo and his "expertise" check out http://www.ezzo.info. That which is good in Babywise is not unique and that which is unique is NOT GOOD!
For much more information on Mr. Ezzo and his "expertise" check out http://www.ezzo.info. That which is good in Babywise is not unique and that which is unique is NOT GOOD!
Katherine P. (katherinep) - , reviewed On Becoming Baby Wise: Giving Your Infant the Gift of Nighttime Sleep on
I've read that this edition of Babywise has corrected much of the dangerous information in the previous books. The message in this one came across to me as a guideline versus a rule. I agreed with a lot about what he said and of course it's hard not to agree with the goal of this book - have an infant with a predictable schedule who sleeps as long as possible at night. I found it interesting and had some information that was good to keep in mind but didn't follow it exactly. The book was recommended to me by both my childbirth nurse who had used it with her 3 children and my OB.
Sam R. (much2bthankful4) reviewed On Becoming Baby Wise: Giving Your Infant the Gift of Nighttime Sleep on + 11 more book reviews
I know that it is not recommended that we summarize our experience, but i must make an exception with this book.
I have a friend who fostered more than 50 babies. Some of them had been exposed to drugs, others, alcohol, and neglectful parents. I had just taken a baby who had been neglected and she recommend the book because I was having such a difficult time. What a lifesaver this book was for me and the baby.
This book certainly had it's controversy but when a mom, dad or whole family is stressed by a new baby, this could be the answer for you. This time in baby's life should be a blessing to a family.
My friend managed to get all her babies to sleep through the night. What a blessing for the parent or caretaker when they got the child back. And my baby got on a schedule and became a joy.
Btw, I had to split the portions in half and double the schedule at first and then I went to the schedule in the book.
I have a friend who fostered more than 50 babies. Some of them had been exposed to drugs, others, alcohol, and neglectful parents. I had just taken a baby who had been neglected and she recommend the book because I was having such a difficult time. What a lifesaver this book was for me and the baby.
This book certainly had it's controversy but when a mom, dad or whole family is stressed by a new baby, this could be the answer for you. This time in baby's life should be a blessing to a family.
My friend managed to get all her babies to sleep through the night. What a blessing for the parent or caretaker when they got the child back. And my baby got on a schedule and became a joy.
Btw, I had to split the portions in half and double the schedule at first and then I went to the schedule in the book.
Antonia F. (toni-frazier) reviewed On Becoming Baby Wise: Giving Your Infant the Gift of Nighttime Sleep on + 5 more book reviews
Great ideas in this book. You definitely have to follow them loosely and listen to your parental instincts. I agree with the CIO method, but only for a short period of time (15 min). Wouldn't let my 7 week old cry for that long. But the eat, wake/play, sleep is a brilliant idea. Would recommend to a friend.
I would give this book 5 stars. My baby slept consistently for 5-6 hours straight at night around 7 weeks. I nursed on a schedule but did not let the clock dictate like he suggests. My baby was happy, healthy and I never had an issue with my milk supply (and I nursed until my son was 12 1/2 months). If you plan to parent using the attachment method, then do not bother reading this book because it will go against what you want to do. But for those of us looking to have some predictability and routine (both of which are good for babies too), I would highly recommend this book. Another reviewer suggested waiting until your baby was 2 months before implementing the suggested schedule. My thoughts (which are suggested in the book) are to focus on getting your baby to eat until he/she is full at each nursing session for the first couple weeks. It's difficult enough to keep them awake at this stage so trying too much too soon can be overwhelming. A very helpful book and one I will be using again soon when baby #2 is born.
I really enjoyed this book on helping baby sleep through the night. I would recommend this book to all new parents.
Rebecca C. (fairydragon309) reviewed On Becoming Baby Wise: Giving Your Infant the Gift of Nighttime Sleep on
This book is dangerous! BAD parenting advice!!! It encourages parents to separate themselves from their children.
