Search -
Bring Yourself to Love: How Couples Can Turn Disconnection into Intimacy and Creative Communication for a Naturally Spiritual Marriage/Committed Relationship, Using Internal Family Systems
Bring Yourself to Love How Couples Can Turn Disconnection into Intimacy and Creative Communication for a Naturally Spiritual Marriage/Committed Relationship Using Internal Family Systems Author:Mona Barbera, Ph.D., Mona Barbera Bring Yourself to Love teaches couples what to do when they feel hurt or disappointed by their partners. Instead of blaming, forcing, protecting, distancing or attacking the one they love, they can change their worst relationship experiences into surprising moments of intimacy, humor, connection, and empowerment. When its time for feedback, p... more »artners will learn that they must be calm, confident and courageous when they begin, and most importantly afterward, when they are likely to get at least three waves of defensive reactions. Bring Yourself to Love teaches people that the most difficult reactions in relationships contempt, arguing, distancing, hopelessness, punishing, forcing, and addictions are actually attempts at a solution. Understanding the logic behind these behaviors will help partners identify them within themselves, develop the ability to choose other responses when they are most hurt, and access calm and creativity right in the middle of a difficult couples situation. Readers will be relieved to find out that they don t have to practice strict verbal guidelines, change themselves, or even learn new verbal techniques. They have everything they need within themselves if they can access it with clarity, compassion, and calm. Partners learn to give better back in the moment of greatest distress, and pivot from disconnection to connection, from forcing to respect, and from judgment to compassion. Bring Yourself to Love uses vivid story examples of real-life couples, including the author s private reactions, as she sits with couples in her psychology practice. Exercises follow most chapters so readers can apply their learning.« less