, this is bugging me, so any help would be great.

I am looking for a book, probably from around the mid to late 1990's, the hero is in some kind law enforcement, i think the heorine might be as well. The heroine's ex-husband (who was thought dead) comes back after her. The hero protects her while the husbands capture is attempted.

If I remember correctly, the husband was not only abusive to her, making her rely on him completely for everything, but he also killed their baby to make her pay for not following his rules...i could be confused on that part though.

One detail I remember clearly is the hero is a widower with two or three adult daughters and he still wears his ring because he can't get it off his finger without cutting the ring off.

One scene I remember is the heroine overhears the hero on the phone with one of his daughters(I think the daughters name was Erin) but thinks it he is talking to his wife because she sees the ring and isn't aware he is a widower. Later, after a upsetting event, the hero suggests a drink for the two of them and she refuses, telling him that she doesn't think it is a good idea because of how he sounded on the phone with his wife, he informs her he is a widower and she lets him inside for a drink. while having the drink, she drops the bottle and alcohol spills on the table and the heor's hands. the heroine cleans up the alcohol on the table with paper towels and then proceeds to kiss, lick and suck the alcohol from the heor's fingers. he backs her against and wall and they kiss and then they end up in bed. 
When they discuss his weddng ring, I remember that he says he cannot take it off because he's worn it so long it won't come off, and he doesn't want to get it cut off out of respect to his wife. In the end of the book he is able to get the ring off without cutting it, which pleases the heroine (that it didn't have to be cut off).

Shannon, you might want to try posting this at Book Sleuth over on abebooks: http://forums.abebooks.com/abesleuthcom. They're very good at this kind of thing.

You might also consider cross-posting this in Love and Romance forum here.

Good luck!

Les

thanks for the suggestion, i'd already cross-posted, but the books sleuth suggestion is great.