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Topic: how to define "whore"

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Subject: how to define "whore"
Date Posted: 2/13/2010 4:36 PM ET
Member Since: 5/3/2006
Posts: 6,436
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We're playing "Rock Band" with my 8 year old son, which is rated T for Teens, and I'm trying to prepare for the day he asks me what a "whore" is. I suppose the definition, "any woman who slept with the hero before you did" isn't really approrpiate? ;-)

Date Posted: 2/13/2010 4:55 PM ET
Member Since: 7/14/2007
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A man or woman who is intimate with others for money or material goods.

Date Posted: 2/13/2010 5:08 PM ET
Member Since: 3/14/2009
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What Sharon said plus, I would add for power and status.

Date Posted: 2/13/2010 5:40 PM ET
Member Since: 6/20/2007
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Willa, I think that the breadth of your definition depends on your values and what you want to teach your son. I'm very conservative but I would not want my child to think that every woman who has sex outside of marriage is a whore.

For most kids, I think that defining a whore as a prostitute, in the narrowest interpretation - money for sex - does the job. Kids don't need the nuances and elaboration.

I remember when Libby was about 6 years old, she asked me what "innocent" means. I started explaining about criminal guilt and innocence, then stopped and asked her the context (yeah, she knew what context means - we'd already discussed that one). She told me about a Brittany Spears song in which she sang "I'm not that innocent." A whole different spin. So I told Lib she was bragging about being a bad girl. To which Lib replied, "That's stupid." LOL

Colleen

Date Posted: 2/13/2010 5:57 PM ET
Member Since: 2/12/2008
Posts: 4,470
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To me there is a difference between a whore and a prostitute. Prostitutes do it for money & power and yes they whore themselves around. Not all whores do it for money. There are lots of whores around who don't do it for money. But, they are definitely loose & cheap about who they give themselves to. And they don't care. It's different from someone who's had multiple partners, may be a serial dater, because she cares about the person she's been with. Sex, for her means something different.

Date Posted: 2/13/2010 8:31 PM ET
Member Since: 8/25/2007
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I dunno Willa, I rather like your definition. 

Date Posted: 2/13/2010 8:44 PM ET
Member Since: 1/23/2009
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LOL - I too like your definition Willa ;) Oh and I really hope I don't have to answer that particular question from either of my kids anytime soon.



Last Edited on: 2/13/10 8:44 PM ET - Total times edited: 1
Date Posted: 2/13/2010 9:17 PM ET
Member Since: 5/3/2006
Posts: 6,436
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Colleen, I think we must have that Britanny Spears song on Dance Dance Revolution, because it's very familiar to me. Guess I should be glad I've already dodged that bullet! ;-) To say nothing of "the Whistle Song."

I'm not entirely sure he knows what *sex* is - we have good kids reproduction books and he's very intelligent, but he's autistic and his memory works differently. He doesn't show the slightest sign of being aware of why his dad and I sometimes take some "private time." I think if it comes up, I will say that some people are lonely and have to pay someone to act like they love them, and it's a very mean name to call someone who does that. And hope he doesn't get pissed with me when he's older and realizes I hedged the question some. :-\

Date Posted: 2/13/2010 9:33 PM ET
Member Since: 6/20/2007
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Willa, I don't think there is anything wrong with limiting an explanation to your child's level of understanding. When Lib was younger, she wanted to know what they meant on TV when they said someone was "gay." I just told her it described a man who loved another man instead of a woman. I didn't need to describe physical homosexuality in detail to satisfy her curiosity.

When her "tween" years approached, I got her books about puberty and sexuality that describe it in a factual, clinical way. We've had some frank discussions, but knowing my own kid, she'd rather read about it, then ask any unanswered questions. Our kids are all different and they have different learning styles. You know best how to communicate with your son and how much information he needs at his particular level of maturity.

I tend to "overengineer" and give Libby too much info. But I always try to describe things in terms she can understand. *sigh* I now have a 13-yr-old who can explain history and current events to her grandmother. '-D

Colleen

Date Posted: 2/13/2010 10:50 PM ET
Member Since: 5/15/2008
Posts: 242
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Good question Willa...one I'm not ready to answer yet! LOL.   Ai yi yi....we've discussed funerals, death, and abortion so far.  Haven't touched that one yet.   My 11 year old just asked today what erectile dysfuction was (saw the commerical)...I passed that one on to my husband.....

Date Posted: 2/13/2010 10:57 PM ET
Member Since: 6/20/2007
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Aw, come on, Jessie! You can handle that one! Just say that the man is unable to have sex. Kids don't need the details!

Colleen

Date Posted: 2/13/2010 11:08 PM ET
Member Since: 6/21/2008
Posts: 6,543
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It is amazing what they pick up on TV.  My four year old neice was told one morning that her aunt in Canada had a baby girl last night.  Isn't that exciting?!

Her reply:   Did Aunt Diane push hard?

Source of information was Dougie Houser MD on TV.  Color me red.  I was 16 until I had even really learned all the facts, including the pushing part.

Date Posted: 2/14/2010 12:56 AM ET
Member Since: 10/30/2006
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Last Edited on: 3/17/10 7:29 AM ET - Total times edited: 1
Date Posted: 2/14/2010 1:17 AM ET
Member Since: 2/12/2008
Posts: 4,470
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"And bless Tim Gunn for unknowingly being the standard to which other gay men are held. Can't think of a better man for the job."

 

   

Date Posted: 2/15/2010 12:27 AM ET
Member Since: 12/28/2006
Posts: 14,177
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Cute answers to OP.  I'm going with Colleen on this one, the first time kids ask these type of questions they just want the short/simple answer.  Way too often I'd launch into a complex answer, then one of the kids would catch my eye and say  somthing like "enough already".  Later they will want the longer, more complete explaination with cross references  :P

Date Posted: 2/15/2010 9:05 AM ET
Member Since: 4/7/2008
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There was this cute McDonald's commercial in Spanish TV a few years ago that goes as follows:

The kid asks his father: What is sex?

The father goes into a long winded explanation (they are eating at McDonalds as they speak of course.) Once he's done, the kid looks confused and asks his father:

How do I fit all that in here? And he shows his father a form.

Of course, the kid was asking what was sex as in 'gender'. :)