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Topic: Husbands TBR Pile Comments

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Subject: Husbands TBR Pile Comments
Date Posted: 11/10/2007 11:46 AM ET
Member Since: 3/24/2007
Posts: 4,634
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Hi Ladies,

I need to vent and ask what you all do/say.  My husband made a comment to me this morning about just how many books can I read, i.e., there are too many books laying around.  From things I have read on the Forum, my TBR mountain is on the small side.  I don't go to the FOL sales, or Goodwill, or garage sales etc., etc.  Yes, I'll probably never read them all, but so what??

How do you ladies handle these comments from husbands or significant others?  I feel better now that I have vented.

 

Date Posted: 11/10/2007 12:01 PM ET
Member Since: 8/25/2007
Posts: 13,134
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I just say that I enjoy reading, it helps me take my mind off stressors that could otherwise make me really b*tchy, so he should be thankful!  I admit it does bother him when I have several books piled in various places in the house.  I bought a plastic storage container at the store and have been putting my TBR books in there, so that does help a bit.  Maybe you can do that. 

Date Posted: 11/10/2007 12:03 PM ET
Member Since: 3/24/2007
Posts: 4,634
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Dawn,  Thanks.  I like the idea of the plastic storage container.  I see a trip to Target in my near future. LOL

Date Posted: 11/10/2007 12:16 PM ET
Member Since: 6/9/2007
Posts: 745
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I also have mine in a plastic storage container at the end of my couch so it doubles as an end table and if my hubby does happen to say anything, my comment is....Do I say anything about the number of truck parts that are laying around your shop? ;-)He usually doesn't say anything about my books but he does shake his head when I tell him my reminder list has over 700 books on it. LOL  However, I'm trying not to get any more books until they can fit in my container but is it my fault some of my WL books are coming in??

Date Posted: 11/10/2007 12:43 PM ET
Member Since: 10/7/2007
Posts: 106
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My husband keeps telling me that I've got to down size my book collection. He really doesn't  understand why I "keep" books that I have read. I've tried to explain that I re-read them sometimes. It's like visiting with old friends. As far as my TBR, I have baskets and decorative chests (all with lids) and I stash books in them with only my current "series" on the end table.

All in alI think an addiction to books  is one of the least harmful addictions there is and for those of us that have stressful jobs, there is nothing like escaping into another world or another time just to relax, particularly when we read books with happy endings.

Date Posted: 11/10/2007 1:20 PM ET
Member Since: 2/24/2006
Posts: 5,498
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I'd tell him you could be out spending tons of money shopping or go clubbing with the girls but instead you are at home READING!  Let him take his pick.    I have a small stack next to the dresser and I have another stack behind the bedroom door where noone can see them.  They aren't hurting anything and I usually trade for more than I get in return, so what does it hurt?  There are alot worse things you could be doing with your time and energy!  I like the idea of a storage container - you should go with that.

Sherri

Date Posted: 11/10/2007 1:52 PM ET
Member Since: 8/23/2007
Posts: 26,510
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Well I have about 250 of what my DH calls my "porno" books.  Ha ha.  I just remind him of the  50 wine/liquer glasses, 200 bottles of wine and the 400+ cigars he has and that shuts him up. I also remind him that after I read my books I can sell them back to the UBS or trade them for dif books.  But once he smokes a cigar or drinks his wine-it's gone.



Last Edited on: 11/10/07 1:53 PM ET - Total times edited: 1
Date Posted: 11/10/2007 2:20 PM ET
Member Since: 12/7/2005
Posts: 1,002
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My husband just laughs.  If he's out without me and passes a yard sale with books he stops and calls me and reads titles to me over the cell phone in case I want something.  When he travels he likes to kill time away from the motel by going to thrift stores and reading the romance titles to me.  That's how I got my copies of Sizzle and The Cinderella Deal and Nora Roberts Promise Me Tomorrow and a bunch of other collectibles for a quarter or sometimes fifty cents.  I've shopped via cell phone in at least a dozen states now. He's always so proud of himself when he makes a real find.  And I'm proud of him too.  He's a peach.  The funny thing is that he's not a reader. 

Date Posted: 11/10/2007 2:32 PM ET
Member Since: 9/23/2006
Posts: 527
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Lealee- your husband sounds awesome! :D

Aww, that must be annoying to have them complain. The storage ideas sound great though! I don't live with my boyfriend, but for some reason he thinks my book collection is "cool" and he loves going to bookstores with me. Then again, who knows what he'd say if we lived in the same place? He said he's never dated a girl that was interested in reading and he loves that, and I've passed him a lot of books I thought he would enjoy and he ended up loving them so he digs that too. He's even told me to take pictures of my bookshelves on the digital camera he got me so he could show his friends what a "book nerd" I am. He's a musician with an entire studio made and a nice guitar collection, so I think he understands the mentality :) I'm the same way with DVDs too...



Last Edited on: 11/10/07 2:48 PM ET - Total times edited: 1
Date Posted: 11/10/2007 3:48 PM ET
Member Since: 3/24/2007
Posts: 4,634
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Oh you guys are giving me a good laugh.  Mary, I love your response to your husband.  We have piles of old checks and those sensitive kinds of documents you just can't pitch in the dumpster.  He knows we need to dispose of them, and I've found a couple of document disposal places that we could take them to, but he doesn't trust them. (big, big deep sigh).  He says one day he'll shred them with our home shredder.  I'll believe it when I see it.  I'll probably be getting rid of them after the funeral in 20+ years.

Funny thing, too, he is a reader and he does have some piles from the FOL sales he goes to, just not to the extent that I do.  And also, I don't think he gets the whole online community thing.  So, some of the piles are my bookshelf and then my "special" pile for the swaps.  Oh well, we've been together for 32 years, so I've invested too much time in him to trade him for 3 20 year olds. :D

Date Posted: 11/10/2007 5:18 PM ET
Member Since: 8/3/2005
Posts: 798
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Does he have anything that he collects that he leaves lying around?  My husband collects action figures, and he did have them laying around for a while.  He complained once about my TBR pile and I just looked him square in the eye and said, "you throw my books away...your action figures go to the kiddos for play toys"

 

That stopped the arguement right there.

Date Posted: 11/11/2007 1:39 AM ET
Member Since: 10/27/2005
Posts: 35
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My reply is "At least I'm not spending the milk money on crack!"

Date Posted: 11/11/2007 9:30 PM ET
Member Since: 8/21/2005
Posts: 989
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Rubbermaid underbed storage totes!!!  My husband never looks underneath our bed, and i have 3 of those long,flat, underbed storage totes filled with books and he has no clue the amount of books i already have. Out of sight, out of mind.

Date Posted: 11/12/2007 12:56 AM ET
Member Since: 7/31/2006
Posts: 14,634
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geez..you'd think being single I'd be free from pesty comment but no..,my parents visit every few months and my mom makes comments about me not needing any more bo oks and i'd better not be orderin gany more..hello? i'm 40 yrs old here screw off! my friend tells me i have too many...sigh...no wonder i wanna be a hermit...

Date Posted: 11/12/2007 8:59 AM ET
Member Since: 1/11/2007
Posts: 1,646
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I'd get a storage container and hide a few in the basement.  What he doesn't know won't hurt him ;-)

Date Posted: 11/12/2007 1:44 PM ET
Member Since: 10/7/2007
Posts: 106
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LOL! I LOVE hearing from others that have the same addiction to books that I do. I must say that I felt a flicker of envy re Lealee's husband. I mean how cool is that, that he cruises UBS and yard sales for her! WOW! But then I looked at my lovely floor to ceiling book cases that my husband just built for me and remember why I love him in spite of his grumpiness about my books.

I was fussing to a friend of mine ( a non reader, but she has known me for over 40 years), telling her that my husband said I needed to get rid of most of my books. She told me to look him up and down and then say, "hmm...6 foot high, 3 foot wide, I could stack a lot of books in that much space." LOL! I would never SAY that, but I still grin every time I think about it. We've been married 33 years and I wouldn't trade him for my books....

Date Posted: 11/12/2007 4:54 PM ET
Member Since: 8/10/2007
Posts: 679
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My husband loves the fact that I can read right beside him on the couch and tune out the TV.

Date Posted: 11/13/2007 12:40 PM ET
Member Since: 8/23/2007
Posts: 26,510
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Denise: I do the same thing.  We'll snuggle on the couch, me reading, him watching sports. 

Date Posted: 11/16/2007 3:53 PM ET
Member Since: 3/1/2007
Posts: 16,716
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I identify with some answers I've read............book addiction is probably the harmless you can have.

I say reading and books is my only vice so if my DH ever c/o about the number of books I have........I can compare it with what he spends on cigarettes and alcohol............which are a lot more harmful than my books.  He doesnt c/o about my books but doesnt like me reading while sitting in front of the tv.  I dont get much reading done when he's home as he does expect my attention........and thats a different problem.   :0)  I relish any time I have alone anymore with my books.  

Date Posted: 11/16/2007 6:44 PM ET
Member Since: 2/18/2006
Posts: 9
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I just remind my husband of his video games addiction.

"When he says Do you really need more books, I reply, do you really need that new game?" 

Or when he tells me "I'm gonna sell some of those books, you've already read them."  I just reply. "Okay. I'm going to sell some of those games, you've already played them"

I keep my TBR on a certain bookshelf, so it is out of the way.  Books that I have read and are keepers go on a different book shelf. 

My books for PBS or for other trades etc are in a plastic bin seperate from everything else.

 

DH does understand though that reading helps me through stressful situations.  COmplicated pregnancy, premature labor, etc etc.

Date Posted: 11/16/2007 7:25 PM ET
Member Since: 8/12/2006
Posts: 1,012
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This is funny!  I'm not alone... My husband thinks I have a serious book problem and maybe I do.

I have two full bookshelves upstairs, two downstairs and several boxes full of books TBR.  I am an addict and like to hit Goodwill and used book sales whenever I see them.  I like to go on box day and stock up.  I think he would be happy if I did a 2 for 1 on here, but then I would just order more :-)

 

I might have to think about the plastic bin under the bed.  I bet that would make my husband happy.  He cannot stand my piles of books everywhere.

Thanks for the idea!

Date Posted: 11/16/2007 8:41 PM ET
Member Since: 12/8/2006
Posts: 29,785
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My Hubby used to make comments like that. He stopped when I started ignoring him. I rarely go buy a book brand new, unless it's something I can't get my hands on...then I shop at WalMart first. My Hubby is a reader, but not as voracious as me, he has one shelf all to himself, I have the other 5 or so.

A few months (maybe a year) ago, I had been out with the kids somewhere and when I got home, he was putting together bookshelves as a surprise for me! He bought a large 5-shelfer for our bedroom, and a small 3-shelfer for the livingroom. I was so thrilled! Who needs diamonds when your Hubby buys you bookshelves to help organize your habit?

I've pared my TBR pile down quite a bit, so I am able to keep some of my books that are posted on a shelf, my TBR on 2 shelves and my keepers on a shelf, and the DH's shelf. Then I have hardcover keepers on the ET center. I keep a lot of books in empty water boxes. The Great Value brand 24 pack of water. You can keep quite a few paperbacks in one and they stack pretty nicely.

Date Posted: 11/21/2007 2:42 PM ET
Member Since: 1/11/2007
Posts: 1,646
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now my hubby is making comments too, but about my "keeper pile".  I figure I have about 25 or so.  Is this a normal amount or excessive?  If figure about 1 out of 50  or so is kept. 

Date Posted: 11/21/2007 3:11 PM ET
Member Since: 2/24/2006
Posts: 5,498
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Mine is only about 20 so I don't think that's obsessive at all!

Sherri

Date Posted: 11/21/2007 6:12 PM ET
Member Since: 6/9/2007
Posts: 745
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Your keeper piles are small compared to mine--especially if I include my civil war collection and college textbooks! I would guess mine is easily 200, probably more!