Webster must be rolling over in his grave right now.
Blue Collar Comedy alum Jeff Foxworthy has penned a handy little guide to redneck terminology, taking words like 'mitosis' (method of cell division) and 'tableau' (picture, or scene), giving them simplified definitions and applying them to more common day-to-day conversation. I mean, really - wo talks about a 'tableau' at a gallery or art show? You're more likely to ask for a cutback on your usual round of Budweiser at the local watering hole so you can keep your 'tableau'. Get it? Oh, Foxworthy is full of them.
In a nutshell, it's a 151-page read chock full of wordplay. If you're a little anal and uptight about your grammar, you probably won't get the same laughs out of this book as a NASCAR-lovin', beer-drinkin' Texan will...if he can tear his eyes away from Tony Stewart long enough to read it, that is.
And though the book has no real use other than being able to identify slight loopholes in the English language in which one word sounds like a combination of two or more slang terms, the alternating detailed Oxford-worthy denotations bounce perfectly off the proceeding examples that are destined to become a part of Larry the Cable Guy's act. Particular favorites are 'honor student', describing a female instructor allowing her student to...earn some good grades, I guess you can say; 'Sioux Falls', elaborating on a woman named Susan's apparent clumsiness; 'Mayberry', in which a personal's burial site is contemplated; and 'cannelloni', describing the limited capacity of a can.
If none of those make sense, fulfil your curiosity and give it a look. Reading it will only take about two hours of your time, and then you can stuff it under the mattress as your wife walks in the room before you've 'cauterize'.