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Topic: Looking for Books on lose of Baby

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Subject: Looking for Books on lose of Baby
Date Posted: 9/25/2010 5:00 PM ET
Member Since: 1/24/2008
Posts: 407
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My best friend in the whole world went to the doctor at a little over 7 months pregnant and they said the baby was dead and they did a c-section last night.  I'm looking for any books that may help them.  They are Christians, so we are looking for Christian books or anything that does not have any new age, universalism, etc in it. 

Date Posted: 9/25/2010 5:08 PM ET
Member Since: 8/3/2009
Posts: 335
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Holding On to Hope is one that I have. It uses the story of Job and Losing Malcolm (I really don't remember much about this one, but I have it.  I've lost 3 babies and one would have been 10 on Sept 30th, she was stillborn at 36 wks, and another was born on Nov 30th, and he died Dec 17th and would have been 9 this year, and then we had a miscarriage.  So I've pretty much experienced it all.  I', not offering these, they are permantly on my Bookshelf, but trying to offer suggestions.   My best advise is to let her talk to you about it as much and often as she wants.  Let her know you aren't tired of hearing about it (even if you are), she needs someone besides her husband to talk to about it.  Even though it's been 10 yrs since we lost our first, it still hurts, especially right now with her Bday coming up in a few days, just not as bad.  I wish her luck, and best wishes through her grief.

Date Posted: 9/25/2010 5:54 PM ET
Member Since: 1/24/2008
Posts: 407
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Thank you for the book ideas.  Wow, I am so sorry for your lose.  I'll keep you in prayer.  I could listen to my friend talk for as long and as often as she needs.  She is my closest friend.  Her sister and other friends want to be with her right now, so I'm writing her letters.  I know the bulk of the people tend to go on their way after about a week, and hopefully I can be there then.  Until some of the people leave her alone, I think me being there is just going to add to the problem of everyone showing up multiple times per day.  If you don't mind me asking, what should I do if there are a lot of other people trying to help their family this week?

Date Posted: 9/25/2010 6:26 PM ET
Member Since: 8/3/2009
Posts: 335
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I'll send you a PM so we don't tie up the Book Bazaar.  I hope you get more ideas.

Date Posted: 9/25/2010 10:29 PM ET
Member Since: 1/8/2009
Posts: 227
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I'm sorry to hear about your friend! My friend who had multiple miscarriages said that many of her friends avoided her after her loss, and that was horrible.  Pray for her.  If she has other children, offer to take them with you to the park.  Let her talk and don't offer any solutions.  Just listen.  Be there for her later. 

Here are 3 Christian books that might help:

When a Baby Dies by Ronald H. Nash
When Your Baby Dies Through Miscarriage or Stillbirth by Louis Gamino
I'll Hold You In Heaven by Jack Hayford