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Topic: Since the new "friends" has changed...

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Subject: Since the new "friends" has changed...
Date Posted: 7/3/2010 4:55 AM ET
Member Since: 11/30/2007
Posts: 4,985
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I've lost three buddies(friends)! Why is this happening? Anyone else having this happen to them?

Date Posted: 7/3/2010 5:52 AM ET
Member Since: 8/16/2007
Posts: 15,201
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My best guess is that some people are not liking that friends lists can be viewed by other members now and are wiping their lists clean. 

Sandra (dru) -
Date Posted: 7/3/2010 8:49 AM ET
Member Since: 1/20/2006
Posts: 508
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This really hasn't changed, it is just more obvious now than it was before. You can go to Settings, Privacy Control and scroll down a little to Friends and set it so that only you can see your Friends.
 

ETA: This is just a suggestion on a way to handle the problem of people deleting Friends because of the ability to be seen on others Friends lists.



Last Edited on: 7/3/10 12:12 PM ET - Total times edited: 1
Date Posted: 7/3/2010 10:45 AM ET
Member Since: 1/14/2007
Posts: 16,831
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I'm with Melanie here. The three Friends you "lost" possibly deleted their "Friends"!

Date Posted: 7/3/2010 11:36 AM ET
Member Since: 5/25/2010
Posts: 262
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Does setting that privacy control really fix the problem? I can say that I don't want to show my friends, but if I don't want to be displayed as a friend on my friends' lists, is that an option? Perhaps that's why people might duck out of friendships?

Date Posted: 7/3/2010 12:00 PM ET
Member Since: 5/18/2007
Posts: 13,206
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I have my friends set so only I can see just like before the changes. Or I supposedly do, I haven't checked and it's not that big of a deal to me.

Also, whether I can be seen on someone else's friend's list is something that hasn't changed either. It's always been based on what the friend's settings are as to whether you can be seen or not. And what is seen is what YOU have put out there in your profile anyhow -- no more, no less.

To me, it's no different than before and it's no different than having the ability to have others see your profile/bookshelf. It's just in a more prominent place.

Date Posted: 7/3/2010 12:13 PM ET
Member Since: 8/16/2007
Posts: 15,201
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I agree that it really isn't much different than before other than the method we view the stuff, but there are some members that feel that the changes have created a lack of privacy and made it hard for them to protect their own information (not saying that is my opinion, saying it is an opinion that has been voiced). A member can set their own list to show only to me, but there's nothing they can do about a Friend allowing their Friends or everyone to see their list. Many people decide to do cleanup on their account when new things are implemented.

Date Posted: 7/4/2010 1:58 PM ET
Member Since: 1/14/2007
Posts: 16,831
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You CAN control who see's what.  On the Friends area of your Profile, click:  Control who can see your list of friends. Your choice is "everyone, only friends, friends of friends."   However, you can't control who  your Friends show their list to.



Last Edited on: 7/4/10 1:59 PM ET - Total times edited: 1
Date Posted: 7/4/2010 4:35 PM ET
Member Since: 2/12/2008
Posts: 4,470
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Wait, let me get this straight, I have MY settings set to private. I can't control if my Friends have their settings set to public or no one can see. If they are public, on my Friends list, someone can click on my name and see my info that way?

Date Posted: 7/4/2010 4:35 PM ET
Member Since: 2/12/2008
Posts: 4,470
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Wait, let me get this straight, I have MY settings set to private. I can't control if my Friends have their settings set to public or no one can see. If they are public, on my Friends list, someone can click on my name and see my info that way?

 

Nevermind. I decided to delete all my Friends, too.



Last Edited on: 7/4/10 5:12 PM ET - Total times edited: 1
Date Posted: 7/4/2010 6:52 PM ET
Member Since: 5/18/2007
Posts: 13,206
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Never mind. It was snarky ..... so I'll let it be.



Last Edited on: 7/4/10 6:54 PM ET - Total times edited: 1
Date Posted: 7/4/2010 7:07 PM ET
Member Since: 8/16/2007
Posts: 15,201
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Wait, let me get this straight, I have MY settings set to private. I can't control if my Friends have their settings set to public or no one can see. If they are public, on my Friends list, someone can click on my name and see my info that way?

No. No one can EVER SEE ANY OF YOUR INFORMATION as long as you set it all to only me. But, some people do not want others to even see who their Friends are. I can set my Friends list to Only Me so no one can see who my Friends are, but if one of my Friends doesn't have their's set that way, then someone can see ME on their list. That's all anyone is saying here, others can see you as a Friend of someone else even if you've set your own Friends list to be seen only by you.

I think you are working really hard to find this change a detriment to your privacy and aren't listening to the numerous times you've been told that as long as you put all of your information to Only You, you will be the only one to see it.