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Topic: SOS---vent about waiting for members to accept requests

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Subject: SOS---vent about waiting for members to accept requests
Date Posted: 6/11/2009 7:39 AM ET
Member Since: 8/25/2007
Posts: 13,134
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::vent mode on high::

I got offered a WL book on the 6th and accepted it that same day.  Still waiting for the request to be accepted by the other "member".  I requested a book on the 7th from another member and am also still waiting for that one to be accepted too.  WTF is wrong with members??!!  I so badly want to PM both and blast them about posting books and then apparently buggering off.   I generally always accept requests as soon as I get them, though I have waited a few days on a couple when I realize I'm not sure where they are and that gives me time to make sure I still  have them (I've done that maybe 3 times out of the hundreds of books I've sent out).  I also have always PM'd the requesting member when I have to cancel a request and let them know why (also done this only a handful of times).  It's not that damn difficult to either accept the request or cancel it, so I wish members would p*ss or get off the pot, as we say here.

::vent mode off::

 

Thanks.

Date Posted: 6/11/2009 7:57 AM ET
Member Since: 1/18/2009
Posts: 70
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This is very frustrating and I very much understand where you're coming from. I'm one of those people like you that almost immediately accept a request and get it in the mail asap. Unfortunately, not everyone is like this. Seems like people just don't go on here several times a day. The thing is though, that you always get an email saying that someone is requesting one of your books. So, what's the problem. Most people check their email several times a day.

Date Posted: 6/11/2009 8:29 AM ET
Member Since: 12/21/2007
Posts: 1,642
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While it can be frustrating, here's what might happen:

I can get to the post office one day a week and also time my post office runs with my paycheck. So yes, sometimes I wait to accept a request. Sometimes I wait until the last possible moment to accept and then pick the furtherest mailing date--even though I might get it mailed before then.

Sometimes I don't get on the computer every day--or my computer is off because we are having thunderstorms. Sometimes my email is wonky. Sometimes I'm dealing with a family problem and getting on the computer to check any email is the last thing on my mind. And I can't check my PBS account or email where I work.

Date Posted: 6/11/2009 9:01 AM ET
Member Since: 8/10/2005
Posts: 4,599
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Also remember that the offer you got for the WL book doesn't necessarily mean the member "just" posted it. I have posted WL books, had the person who supposedly wished for the book not respond, go through several 48-hour waiting cycles, so by the time it gets to someone who actually wants and accepts it, I am gone for the weekend or something. THEY may have been waiting for DAYS for someone to accept, and were thus in the same boat you are now--waiting and waiting.

And yes, some people do try to time accepting requests so they only have to go to the PO once a week--if they live a long distance from their local PO or like me, work a schedule such that they can only get there during window hours once a week. (This is why I now use PBS postage, it's just that much more convenient for me.) Other people aren't here every day for whatever reason., some don't have regular computer access or share a computer with multiple family members, so some days even checking e-mail may not be an option.

Recognizing that people do have lives, and that people exist in a variety of circumstances--some of which most of us could never understand--PBS gives a certain amount of time for people to deal with requests, so while it may be annoying to wait, that member has done nothing wrong.

Cheryl

Date Posted: 6/11/2009 12:12 PM ET
Member Since: 8/9/2007
Posts: 4,058
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I hate waiting to have requests accepted a lot more than waiting a week or whatever for accepted requests to be mailed.  I don't even mind if someone goes past the mail by date, as long as they let me know in advance that they'll be doing that.  Once it's accepted I tend to just put them out of my mind and not look at them, unless maybe it's something that they mark to mail on the last possible date, don't drop me a note, and then don't mail on time.  I can totally sympathize with your frustration on this one, Dawn.  There's just something so annoyingly up in the air about that "waiting for member" thing hanging out there for a week.  I try to ignore it, but after a couple of days, my eyes keep sliding back to it on their own, and I start gritting my teeth & wondering wth is going on:P  I only get paid every other Friday and I try to keep myself on a tight book budget, but I guess I get lucky in the timing on my requests most of the time.  I put postage money in my account on payday and that usually covers all of my mailings for that first 7 days.  If I use all of it by the following weekend, the longest I will have to wait to accept a request is until Monday, and then I can accept the requests and mark them to mail by Friday - payday.  Sometimes I even have extra credits I can sell to add to my postage money, so I don't have to wait.  If I don't have credits to sell, I pretty much always send a PM and let the requestors know that I'm not mailing until Friday though, and everyone so far has been fine with it.  I think the biggest thing is communication.  I know I never mind waiting as long as I hear something from a sender, so I try to communicate with my receivers if I'm not sending something right away.  But of course you have to accept the request before you can do that. 

Date Posted: 6/11/2009 1:18 PM ET
Member Since: 2/23/2009
Posts: 53
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i am the opposite i hate posting a wl and then waiting through 48 hour cycles for some one to accept it. I posted the book because someone wanted the book and I wanted the credit.  I do dc so I get my credits right away. Two weeks ago I had to ask to borrow credits because I had 5 WL books pending a response. That is frustrating especially when you go through the 4th or 5th person on the WL or 8 or 10 days.



Last Edited on: 6/11/09 1:20 PM ET - Total times edited: 1
Date Posted: 6/11/2009 4:00 PM ET
Member Since: 8/25/2007
Posts: 13,134
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Recognizing that people do have lives, and that people exist in a variety of circumstances--some of which most of us could never understand--PBS gives a certain amount of time for people to deal with requests, so while it may be annoying to wait, that member has done nothing wrong.

I fully understand that people do have lives, but having offered/requested books time out is a waste of time in MY life.

Date Posted: 6/11/2009 4:10 PM ET
Member Since: 4/30/2007
Posts: 2,728
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I totall get that people have lives and that sometimes things happen.  But sometimes I feel like I'm having my chain yanked.  There was one book that I ordered that I was starting to think was cursed- the first one I received was water damaged, and I ended up getting my credit refunded and sent it back to the sender.  Back onto the WL I went.  The next one sat and sat and sat until literally 30 minutes before it would have timed out, THEN was accepted.  Then they picked the last possible mail date.  That date came and went, the book was never marked mailed, and two days later was cancelled out.  So again, BACK onto the  WL.  I finally did get the book, but GEEZ!  I would never dream of doing that to someone, and if there were some unforseen circumstances that caused it, I would at least PM the requester and apologize and offer an explanation.

Anyway, you have lots of company, Dawn, and  I don't blame you for needing to vent.

Date Posted: 6/11/2009 4:24 PM ET
Member Since: 3/7/2009
Posts: 10,867
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The next one sat and sat and sat until literally 30 minutes before it would have timed out, THEN was accepted.  Then they picked the last possible mail date.  That date came and went, the book was never marked mailed, and two days later was cancelled out.

This happens to me a lot and drives me nuts.  I get that people have lives, but it's frustrating.  Especially on a book that is posted a lot, so I know in the nearly two weeks I've been waiting, the people behind me in line are getting the book offered to them.

Date Posted: 6/11/2009 4:42 PM ET
Member Since: 7/31/2007
Posts: 2,690
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Some of us have lives outside of PBS and the computer...I am up at 5am and out the door by 6am, then I don't get home until 8pm so, do you think that I get on the computer every day...that would be a NO!!!  So, if by chance I get to post a book late one evening and it goes into WL wait, I might not make an effort to check back for 3-4 days...I am afterall allowed 5 days to accept the book.  Once I accept the book I will mark the fartherest out mail by date so that I can arrange to either have someone take the book to the Post Office or make it there myself.  Since I am within the guidelines of what PBS allows I do not feel that I need to spend time (which for me is limited) to send the requestor a PM, unless I am going to need to go outside of the dates I picked.

Date Posted: 6/11/2009 4:45 PM ET
Member Since: 4/9/2009
Posts: 360
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I fully understand that people do have lives, but having offered/requested books time out is a waste of time in MY life.

 

Well at least you are being honest in that you consider your time more important than anyone elses. So exactly how does waiting, cultivating patience, waste your life? You don't have to do anything. You can go for a run. Read a different book. Help your neighbor clean up their yard. Donate blood. Wash your car. Cook a meal. All while you are simply waiting on another human being.

Just think of this type of situation as a character lesson in patience. That is what I have had to do :-) And if you can look at it as a good thing, ie, increasing your patience and tolerance of other humans, it is so much easier to deal with...

Date Posted: 6/11/2009 5:13 PM ET
Member Since: 3/25/2008
Posts: 2,523
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I feel your frustration. I have a WL book that was posted to me 4 days ago. All my WL books are auto request so it was accepted by me within an hour. It's still just sitting there waiting to be accepted. This particular one bothers me more because it's a frequently posted WL book. So it's probably been posted 10 times in the last 4 days & here I sit just waiting to see if this one will be accepted or if I go back on the WL for a few hours and start all over!?! *sigh*

Date Posted: 6/11/2009 5:14 PM ET
Member Since: 4/30/2007
Posts: 2,728
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Christy,  perhaps I wasn't clear enough.  I requested my book on 4/13.  The person didn't accept until the last minute, then selected the last mail date.  They never marked it mailed, nor have I ever received the book from them, and it was cancelled by the system on 4/26.  I spent 13 days waiting for this person to send my book, which they never did, and I had to then wait for it to be posted to me again.  The book I eventually received was from the next person to post the book, NOT the original person- that person never mailed the book, nor ever PMed to explain or apologize for blowing off my book request *which they accepted*.  Not the same thing as what you described at all.  If I eventually got the book from them, I wouldn't have a problem, but that was not the case.

Date Posted: 6/11/2009 5:28 PM ET
Member Since: 5/25/2009
Posts: 55
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I guess, in the world of CHEAP... sometimes we get what we pay for.

I know I get so excited about getting a new book that I sit here WAITING for it to be accepted, shipped... REC'D! But in all reality, what can we truly expect for $2 and some change. I just think this whole progam is soooooo cool!

It is unfortunate that some people don't seem to have any sense of common courtesy. But to leap to the conclusion that a person is just blowing you off for the simple sake of doing so. Well... it's probably more likely that they are quite busy....  oooohhhh how I wish they weren't.

Hope you eventually get the book of your choosing.

Date Posted: 6/11/2009 7:08 PM ET
Member Since: 2/13/2009
Posts: 227
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I have no issue with people using the deadlines to help them with costs or just the time to mail.  Sure, I much prefer to learn fairly quickly that there is life out there and someone has a plan for my request.  I like to know what is coming and going - its part of my fun with the site.  I am a simple gal, I get a little thrill when the book I have finally decided to seek out is coming my way?  So I get what the OP is trying to convey.  It can be disappointing to make a request that kind of fizzles and doesn't sizzle.  

PBS is great in that it has deadlines.  It does ensure that something has to happen.  I do like that. 

 

Date Posted: 6/11/2009 8:42 PM ET
Member Since: 8/25/2007
Posts: 13,134
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Well at least you are being honest in that you consider your time more important than anyone elses.

That's not what I said, so take one step back please.  What I stated was that my time was being wasted by members who post and run, so having a life outside PBS is a lame excuse.  ALL of us have lives outside here.



Last Edited on: 6/11/09 8:42 PM ET - Total times edited: 1
Date Posted: 6/11/2009 8:56 PM ET
Member Since: 9/27/2008
Posts: 370
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I'm sorry that you are frustrated, but if the system gives a person 48 hours to accept a request, and they decide to wait until hour 47, they have done nothing wrong.   The system gives up several days after accepting a request so if a sender wishes to pick the last available date to mail it, they have done nothing wrong. 

Only if, like happened to another poster above, they never mail it out, have they done something wrong.

Date Posted: 6/11/2009 9:23 PM ET
Member Since: 7/31/2007
Posts: 2,690
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Lesley, I wasn't really responding to you as much as I was the OP...your situation I can understand and would find it frustrating. 

I have to agree to this statement, "Well at least you are being honest in that you consider your time more important than anyone elses. "

That's not what I said, so take one step back please.  What I stated was that my time was being wasted by members who post and run, so having a life outside PBS is a lame excuse.  ALL of us have lives outside here.

unless your sender doesn't respond at all then you cannot say they post and run....to me it sounds like you want this person to post the book and sit at the computer waiting on you to accept the book ..... 

You (OP) won't particularly like what I am about to say but, in all honesty you are coming across in this like a spoiled child (IMHO).

Date Posted: 6/11/2009 10:21 PM ET
Member Since: 8/9/2007
Posts: 4,058
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Good golly, you guys:P  Somebody posts a vent and it has to be an indictment against everyone who doesn't eat, drink & sleep at their computers?  C'mon.  I think that pretty much covers everyone:P  The truth of the matter is,  nobody is ever actually venting about the way 99.9% of the people who read & post on this forum are doing their business here.  In most cases, we're all accepting requests & mailing on time, we've all read the guidelines, we don't get RWAP notices for every other book we send out, we mostly use plastic wrap, and blah-blah-blah...  Unfortunately, there are some members out there who do seem to behave with no consideration for their fellow members, and I know we all know it, because we've all either run across these people, or we've read many a hair raising tale about them right here on this forum.  There has been a time or two when I couldn't accept a request right away due to circumstances beyond my control.  The ice storm this past winter and being without power or internet access for several days comes to mind, and like I mentioned before, there are times when I have to delay acceptance through the weekends due to my postage budget being what it is.  When those things happened, it has always been at the back of my mind that someone was on the other end of that transaction, waiting to hear something, and maybe getting impatient in the process.  Sometimes you can do something about that & sometimes you can't.  That's life.  I don't think though, that Dawn was talking about me personally when she posts a vent about waiting to have requests accepted, but then again, I don't take everything personally either:P

And Derrick, everyone values their time more than everyone else's until they have a good reason not to.  It's human nature to not consider the entire world when you're all alone and aggravated about something that's incoveniencing you personally.  That's how humans are wired to think; it's part of our natural survival instinct:P

Date Posted: 6/11/2009 10:55 PM ET
Member Since: 7/31/2007
Posts: 2,690
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Kim...perhaps I'm the exception to your thoughts there but, I do not value my time more than anyone else's because to me to do so would be selfish and inconsiderate.  I tend to put more value on other's time so as not to inconvenience them....

Date Posted: 6/12/2009 12:05 AM ET
Member Since: 1/19/2009
Posts: 2,054
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I have posted several wish list books lately and can't tell you how many of them went through five hundred, 48 hours. I was just venting the other day that I thought more people needed to keep their wishlist up to date and at least have their top five or so on auto request. I know there are many reasons for not meeting the 48 hour deadline but at the same time I could already have it in the mail going to someone that really wants the book if not for the people that don't respond. So it goes both ways....Since the person saw that the book was a wishlist when they posted it and has suddenly disappeared I would bet they have been sitting around dealing with the numerous 48 hours and it took a while to get to you and your position in line.

Date Posted: 6/12/2009 12:20 AM ET
Member Since: 8/9/2007
Posts: 4,058
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Kim...perhaps I'm the exception to your thoughts there but, I do not value my time more than anyone else's because to me to do so would be selfish and inconsiderate.  I tend to put more value on other's time so as not to inconvenience them....

No, Christy, that's not aimed at you.  What I'm saying is that it's human nature to put more value on our own time than anyone else's, and most of us don't automatically think in terms of everyone else.  That's an act of consideration - it requires thought & concern for others.  It's natural to feel peevish, like Dawn is - or was - feeling when she needed to vent, and it doesn't require extra consideration.  And usually, when people vent, it's not because one person waited the maximum time to accept a request, and then mailed on the last possible day.  It's most often because they got a WL offer or ordered something, and it ended up rolling over in FIFO a couple of times.  Waiting the maximum time may make you impatient, but nobody vents until it starts to get a little on the ridiculous side. 

Date Posted: 6/12/2009 12:33 AM ET
Member Since: 7/19/2008
Posts: 15,400
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We had our internet wires cut about 3 months ago.  Sabotage.  I was all pissy at books timing out and rolling over.  Then the whole county was without phone or internet service for days.   Oh my.   Made me remember living in a rural area and being without power due to storms.  I fully agree that there needs to be a space to vent.  But I also know from experience that it isn't always in your control.

Date Posted: 6/12/2009 1:34 AM ET
Member Since: 12/28/2006
Posts: 14,171
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Well yes, real life happens and most of us have probably been in that postion. 

But I agree with Dawn, when I post a wishlisted book and it times out 3 or 4 times...to me this says inactive members not occassional RL issues.  Basically, I've just asked another member if I can spend $2.57 of my money to send them a wishlisted book...the least they can do is answer yes or no in a reasonable time.  After several time-outs in a row, it feels disrespectful to me and the other members waiting in line for the book. 

Some members get pissy that PBS allows posting directly to buddy wishlists...but after a long string of timed-out transactions, it can look very appealing to post our books to a forum thread (ie active members) and mail everything in one trip to the post office vs. transactions dribbling in for a week or two and requiring alot more work for me.

Date Posted: 6/12/2009 7:52 AM ET
Member Since: 8/25/2007
Posts: 13,134
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One of the causes for my original vent ended thusly (email from PBS):

You recently requested the book titled (edited). We have sent multiple emails to the member from whom you requested it, and have not received a response. Because the sender has not responded, we have canceled the request and returned the book credit to your account.

As you know, the success of the club is dependent upon all of us being committed to sharing books in a timely manner.

Note the phrase "timely manner".  

Some members get pissy that PBS allows posting directly to buddy wishlists...but after a long string of timed-out transactions, it can look very appealing to post our books to a forum thread (ie active members) and mail everything in one trip to the post office vs. transactions dribbling in for a week or two and requiring alot more work for me.

And that is why I often do post directly to other members' WL, though I do also post a fair number directly into the system. 

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