The Eclectic Pen - What goes around comes around


By: JOYCE W. (luvthemgoats)   + 5 more  
Date Submitted: 4/19/2007
Last Updated: 4/19/2007
Genre: Biographies & Memoirs » Family & Childhood
Words: 322
Rating:


  I am truly amazed at this boy of mine, who not so long ago would run to me with every boo boo, this same little boy whom every day when I picked him up from school would leap into my arms and hug me like there was no tomorrow, his blue eyes would light up with a light that I knew was just for me. My heart would swell to bursting every time he said he loved me. My arms ache to hold him close and rock him back and forth and feel him relax into his sweet slumber, oh how I long to to read "The cat in the hat" or "The puppy who wanted a boy" to him at night.
These days sometimes this boy is a total stranger to me with his dyed black hair and those pants that the croch drags the ground,The music he listens to sounds like banshees screaming and hyenas yipping. The look in his eyes as he looks at me is it hate or is it disdain or is it the question "why wasnt it you that killed your self instead of my dad?" Does he hate me? I dont know it sure feels like it sometimes. I know I love him more today than yesterday, but not as much as tomorrow...
Maybe in years to come he will allow himself to show love again and when that time comes I will welcome him with arms wide open and heart a bursting.
I seem to remember being 16 once up on a time, the conflicting emotions and the wondering why I was put on this earth. So maybe someday in the future my son will say the same thing to me that I once said to my dear sweet mama "Mom I am so sorry for being a teenager and how in the world did you put up with me?"

With Gods help This to shall pass


The Eclectic Pen » All Stories by JOYCE W. (luvthemgoats)

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Comments 1 to 4 of 4
IONE L. (zaneygraylady) - 4/20/2007 4:03 PM ET
I know it will. I had four teenagers at once. My fantisy was to run away. My worst kid is the most loving now. All my kids are sucessful and living good lives. I have three beautiful grandchildren with another comming in about a month. Keep loving him and he will come back to love you.
Kristen D. - 4/21/2007 10:14 AM ET
The thing about adolescents is that EVERYTHING is new to them but old to you. My heart goes out to you because now I FINALLY realize how my mom felt dealing with me growing up!!! It has to be VERY HARD being a parent, ESPECIALLY a single one. Some comforting advice that my mommy always gives me: 'All things, be them good or bad, shall pass...'I will keep you in my prayers! It WILL BE OKAY...
Sandy B. (mountainmom) - 4/24/2007 9:29 AM ET
Bless your heart, many of us have lived through the raising of a teenager and deserve many thoughts and prayers.
Gina S. (GigiBeanz) - 4/25/2007 12:15 PM ET
Beautiful and emotional.
Comments 1 to 4 of 4