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Topic: What do you do when you can't stop worrying?

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Subject: What do you do when you can't stop worrying?
Date Posted: 3/21/2011 1:07 AM ET
Member Since: 11/18/2010
Posts: 6,647
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MrGrim has been disabled for several years now.  Last year, his kidneys failed due to a reaction to medication and he spent a week in the hospital.  He recovered and has steadily improved.  Ever since then though, I've been plagued by the fear of losing him when I'm not looking.  He doesn't get around much and mostly we just stay home and watch movies or read and listen to music.  I still work 40 hours a week at our cab company, but I rarely go out in the evening.  I hate to make him feel left out, certainly but I also hate to do without his company.  The trouble is that when I do go about my business and leave him at home, whether it's to work or the store or uptown, I can't help but worry about him.  His health is not so poor that he needs constant care, but I can't help dreaming up worst case scenerios when I've left him alone. 

Date Posted: 6/7/2011 12:28 AM ET
Member Since: 11/26/2005
Posts: 773
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I know this is an older post..but I wanted to answer it.  Hope things are better, and if not, I am sorry to bring up sad feelings.  I would suggest, as I did with my mother,  hire someone to come in and help with his care.  Not sure where you live, havent checked your profile, but there are agencies out ther that hire out "mothers helpers" type of people.  You can maybe use them once or twice a week just for your peace of mind. 

 

Date Posted: 6/7/2011 5:53 PM ET
Member Since: 11/18/2010
Posts: 6,647
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I may look into that.  I appreciate your takin' the time to worry about me.  Peace & Love.

Subject: re what do you do when you can't stop worrying
Date Posted: 6/19/2011 1:06 AM ET
Member Since: 9/4/2009
Posts: 1
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I have the same problem and when I am at work, my husband doesnt answer the phone.  His disability is a lack of being able to finish or remember things, and he is disabled from this situation which was due to a stroke at 58.  He was a teacher.  I got his adult sons involved and his brother, because I needed them to be concerned also.  In fact I ended up in the hospital because I was ignoring leg pain and I had my hip replaced.  Don't ignore your own health or needs.  Taking care of yourself will make you feel better and you will have more strength to cope.

Date Posted: 6/19/2011 3:56 AM ET
Member Since: 11/18/2010
Posts: 6,647
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I thank you for your concern for me.  It is easy to worry about him first and when I'm sick, it scares him, I reckon, so it's easy for me to ignore it rather than upset him too.  He's a pretty smart feller though, and still on the ball, just stationary.  He won't let me not take care of myself. 

Date Posted: 5/21/2012 7:48 PM ET
Member Since: 1/23/2010
Posts: 2,364
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The instinct to worry is hardwired into most of us. I hope you have learned how to short-circuit that urge. At the risk of sounding all woo-woo I am a firm believer in the universe giving you back what you put out. When I am concerned about my loved ones I do my best to channel my anxiety into hope. A wish, a prayer whatever feel right for you. Concentrate on all the good things you hope for, instead of worrying about what might happen. It's better for the digestion. Keep your spirits up and treasure what you have, it's a gift. 

Date Posted: 5/31/2012 12:00 PM ET
Member Since: 6/13/2007
Posts: 174
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Have you considered an IP camera? I purchased one when I used up all my FMLA and PTO, so there were times when I was working my wife would have to be home alone. Using an app on my phone I can check and make sure she is ok from anywhere.

Date Posted: 6/17/2013 1:06 AM ET
Member Since: 5/22/2013
Posts: 28
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Hope everything is alright now... 

Date Posted: 2/12/2014 3:51 PM ET
Member Since: 2/2/2008
Posts: 742
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My mind never stops. Its like a revolving door. If I did slow down on worrying about everything and everybody I would have to check my pulse to see if I'm still breathing. Take care of yourself first so you can continue to take care of other's. God will repay you for all the kindness you have in your heart for other's. Now, if I could only make myself believe that , I would have 1 less thing to worry about. See, I worry constantly.

 

many blessings,

Cyn