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Search - Such a Pretty Fat
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Book Description:
One Narcissist's Quest to Discover if Her Life Makes Her Ass Look Big, or Why Pie is Not the Answer
New from the author of Bitter Is the New Black, and Bright Lights, Big Ass.
Personal Training, Session One: I'm standing at the front desk, waiting for the mythical "Barbie" to appear. While I was sucking down water and aspirin earlier today, trying to shed my hangover, I started thinking about how judgmental I can be. I mean, why should I have instantly freaked out when I heard someone named Barbie was going to be my trainer? Sure, the name brings up images of gorgeous girls with long blonde hair, shiny white teeth, deep tans, and impossible-to-achieve, completely enviable figures, but maybe this Barbie is different.
Maybe Trainer Barbie is a dark, homely girl with an overbite and she took up fitness to feel better about her hump and her skin condition. Yes, that's it. Barbie is all hideous and disfigured and she will have a heart of gold and because of this, she'll be devoted to nothing but making me lose weight...
I stand by the magazine rack and I'm about to pull out this week's In Touch when I hear my name being called. I turn around and look for my gargoyle of a trainer.
But I don't see any monsters.
All I see is a gorgeous girl with long blonde hair, shiny white teeth, a deep tan, and an impossible-to-achieve, completely enviable figure standing there. "Hey, are you Jen?" she asks. "I'm Barbie!"
Of course you are.
Chicago Sun-Times:
"She's bitchy and sometimes plain old mean, but she's absolutely hilarious."
Biography
A former vice president at an investor relations firm, Jen Lancaster has written for NYHS and Hatch magazines. She lives with her husband and far too many pets.
New from the author of Bitter Is the New Black, and Bright Lights, Big Ass.
Personal Training, Session One: I'm standing at the front desk, waiting for the mythical "Barbie" to appear. While I was sucking down water and aspirin earlier today, trying to shed my hangover, I started thinking about how judgmental I can be. I mean, why should I have instantly freaked out when I heard someone named Barbie was going to be my trainer? Sure, the name brings up images of gorgeous girls with long blonde hair, shiny white teeth, deep tans, and impossible-to-achieve, completely enviable figures, but maybe this Barbie is different.
Maybe Trainer Barbie is a dark, homely girl with an overbite and she took up fitness to feel better about her hump and her skin condition. Yes, that's it. Barbie is all hideous and disfigured and she will have a heart of gold and because of this, she'll be devoted to nothing but making me lose weight...
I stand by the magazine rack and I'm about to pull out this week's In Touch when I hear my name being called. I turn around and look for my gargoyle of a trainer.
But I don't see any monsters.
All I see is a gorgeous girl with long blonde hair, shiny white teeth, a deep tan, and an impossible-to-achieve, completely enviable figure standing there. "Hey, are you Jen?" she asks. "I'm Barbie!"
Of course you are.
Chicago Sun-Times:
"She's bitchy and sometimes plain old mean, but she's absolutely hilarious."
Biography
A former vice president at an investor relations firm, Jen Lancaster has written for NYHS and Hatch magazines. She lives with her husband and far too many pets.
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Top Member Reviews
16 member(s) found this review helpful.
I picked this up thinking it could be funny and relatable. After 50 pages, I threw it across the room in a fit of annoyance. Ugh.
I haven't read any of this author's other books so maybe I'm missing something, but I just don't understand where her sense of entitlement and high self-esteem comes from. Because honestly, she just comes across as obnoxious and deluded and in desperate need of therapy. Her behavior is borderline sociopath.
And I had to laugh at her 'I'm such an urbanite, I could NEVER move to suburbs!' schtick. Bitch, please. You're from Indiana. Stop frontin'.
Oh, and don't get me started on the footnotes that litter the bottom of every single page. So. Annoying.
When are they going to stop giving every blogger with an audience a book deal? Seriously, just because you can churn out a couple of oh-so-insightful posts a day about the Blue Line and Lucky Charms doesn't mean you should write a book.
In a word: Ugh.
7 member(s) found this review helpful.
This is the kind of book that makes me think "anyone can write a book." It feels rushed in comparison to her first two books. Don't look to this book for any diet advice, or even companionship for real-life, don't-have-the-money-for-my-own-personal-trainer diets. But, it is an easy, light-hearted read if you're in the mood for one.
Janet G. wrote on 7/6/2008...
6 member(s) found this review helpful.
So-so. Her previous books have made me laugh out loud, but this one was just ho-hum. I smiled occasionally, but never felt laughter bubbling up. I caught my self just skimming through alot of it.
Jennifer A. (
3 member(s) found this review helpful.
I thought this book was pretty funny - I agree, not as funny as her other two books - but still worthy of a couple loud giggles. Maybe because I've been on Weight Watchers myself for nearly 5 months and could totally relate to the dieting stories? Perhaps.
However, I found it somewhat disconcerting how in the middle of the book she starts talking about the proposal for this book, and then starting to write this book. It was jarring to me, and didn't quite fit with the rest of the stories.
Overall, though it was a good, quick read. I'm looking forward to her next book, and will always read anything she writes!
Trina C. from BELCHERTOWN, MA wrote on 5/20/2008...
3 member(s) found this review helpful.
Overall pretty good book, although I thought not as funny as her others. Still fun and worth the read!
Sue C. (
1 member(s) found this review helpful.
I love Jen Lancaster. I want her to be my friend. I want to hang out with her and drink fizzy champagne drinks. I want to watch bad TV at her house while sharing the slobbered-on couch with her dog. (Or she can do the same at my house.) I am not totally convinced that we weren't separated at birth. But enough about me. Jen Lancaster's latest might be her best yet...she is laugh-out-loud-did-she-just-write-that?-I-wish-I-had-written-this FUNNY. I have read all her books except one (it's on my WL), and will continue to read everything she writes, including her hysterical blog, jennsylvania.com. She has such biting wit and zingingly accurate tongue. This one covers weight loss and dieting in a way, well, that only Jen can. Jen: can't you see this is a cry for help? Please be my friend!!!
Rate These Member Reviews
Jenny B. from ROSLYN, NY wrote on 9/16/2008...I couldn't put this book down - another hysterical book by Lancaster
Jen Lancaster is funny as usual. Not as good as Bitter & Bright Lights, in my opinion, but still enjoyable!