Fat Vampire Author:Johnny B. Truant When overweight treadmill salesman Reginald Baskin finally meets a co-worker who doesn't make fun of him, it's just his own bad luck that tech guy Maurice turns out to be a two-thousand year old vampire. — And when Maurice turns Reginald to save his life, it's just Reginald's own further bad luck that he wakes up to discover that he's the slowest... more », weakest, most out-of-shape vampire ever born, doomed to "heal" to his corpulent sef for all of eternity.
As Reginald struggles with the downsides of being a fat vampire - too slow to catch people to feed on, mocked by those he tries to glamour,assaulted by his intended prey and left for undead - he discovers in himself rare powers that few vampires have . . . and just in time too, because the Vampire Council might just want his head for being an inferior representative of their race.« less