Margaret B. reviewed Foolproofing Your Life : Wisdom for Untangling Your Most Difficult Relationships on
I love this book! It is full of biblical wisdom from Proverbs about how to identify a fool and how to deal with one. I have read and re-read it, and I ordered the video and study that go with it. I bet everyone has someone in their life who might fit into the "fool" category. She addresses our reluctance to label anyone a fool, and our own foolishness at times - but since God gave us much instruction on how to deal with a fool, it behooves us to learn to identify the fools in our lives. Wonderful book!
Naomi B. (tripleguess) reviewed Foolproofing Your Life : Wisdom for Untangling Your Most Difficult Relationships on + 48 more book reviews
I stumbled on this book after the slow death of what had been a long and very painful emotionally abusive relationship. I had been "left for dead." There was not much of me left. I felt like garbage. Why else had I been treated so badly and then abandoned? I must have somehow deserved it.
Somehow I stumbled on this book. I think I found it on Amazon. In any case, a copy found its way into my hands. I couldn't read it without putting it down every few minutes and sobbing. It was describing my life, and how I had half killed myself trying to satisfy someone who couldn't be satisfied, someone who was always right, someone whose criticisms were as wounding and poisonous as punctures from a rusty nail.
I still wanted to die, but now I understood that what happened was not entirely my fault. I was wrong in that I let it go on for so long. I was guilty of not recognizing lies and manipulation. I was wrong in putting this relationship, at times, above my relationship with God. It was foolish of me not to defend my emotional health and my boundaries; it was foolish of me to project my values and assume that this person cared about me (after all, that's what they said -- occasionally) when their actions suggested otherwise! But I realized that God was still there for me, and that it was possible to walk through the excruciating aftermath one day at a time.
Most liberating of all, I realized that I did not have to let it happen again. I have since seen other "foolish" stickytraps coming and successfully sidestepped them. There's no law that says you can't be somewhere else! I am so grateful to Jan Silvious for spelling out that I must not take responsibility for someone else's physical or emotional wellbeing, that it is not my fault if they choose to make themselves unhappy over my decisions. Sadly, this is not a principle I often hear in church; I believe the first person to tell me anything of the sort was the instructor at a rape prevention class. The similarities are not a coincidence.
If you are trapped in a similarly suffocating relationship, get your hands on this book! There IS a way out and you can find it. I have given dozens of copies away and intend to keep on doing so. Everyone needs to hear this, especially women.
Somehow I stumbled on this book. I think I found it on Amazon. In any case, a copy found its way into my hands. I couldn't read it without putting it down every few minutes and sobbing. It was describing my life, and how I had half killed myself trying to satisfy someone who couldn't be satisfied, someone who was always right, someone whose criticisms were as wounding and poisonous as punctures from a rusty nail.
I still wanted to die, but now I understood that what happened was not entirely my fault. I was wrong in that I let it go on for so long. I was guilty of not recognizing lies and manipulation. I was wrong in putting this relationship, at times, above my relationship with God. It was foolish of me not to defend my emotional health and my boundaries; it was foolish of me to project my values and assume that this person cared about me (after all, that's what they said -- occasionally) when their actions suggested otherwise! But I realized that God was still there for me, and that it was possible to walk through the excruciating aftermath one day at a time.
Most liberating of all, I realized that I did not have to let it happen again. I have since seen other "foolish" stickytraps coming and successfully sidestepped them. There's no law that says you can't be somewhere else! I am so grateful to Jan Silvious for spelling out that I must not take responsibility for someone else's physical or emotional wellbeing, that it is not my fault if they choose to make themselves unhappy over my decisions. Sadly, this is not a principle I often hear in church; I believe the first person to tell me anything of the sort was the instructor at a rape prevention class. The similarities are not a coincidence.
If you are trapped in a similarly suffocating relationship, get your hands on this book! There IS a way out and you can find it. I have given dozens of copies away and intend to keep on doing so. Everyone needs to hear this, especially women.
