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Topic: A member does not want to give me credit...RESOLVED

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Subject: A member does not want to give me credit...RESOLVED
Date Posted: 8/2/2010 8:38 AM ET
Member Since: 10/28/2009
Posts: 47
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I recently mailed a book to a member.  I do not have a printer, so I handwrite the addresses.  I have never had a problem with members marking books received until now.  The book was mailed on the 19th of July, and I still was not getting credit.  I finally sent the message a friendly message asking her to mark the book received so I can get credit.  She responded with a message: "Are you kidding me?"  I sent her two other messages explaining why she needs to mark the book received and asking if there was some sort of problem.  I still have not gotten a response.  What should I do?

Last Edited on: 8/10/10 7:02 PM ET - Total times edited: 1
Date Posted: 8/2/2010 8:40 AM ET
Member Since: 6/21/2007
Posts: 2,015
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Last Edited on: 2/3/15 5:04 PM ET - Total times edited: 1
Date Posted: 8/2/2010 8:41 AM ET
Member Since: 12/8/2007
Posts: 1,011
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Do you know if she has even received the book yet? I have had them go 1 state over and take several weeks to arrive. Your transaction is nowhere ready to go "lost", so try to give it some more time. I handwrite my addresses all the time and that has never been a problem.

Date Posted: 8/2/2010 9:04 AM ET
Member Since: 4/25/2007
Posts: 11,697
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It's way too soon to be PMing about the book.  It probably has not even arrived yet which is why the recipient isn't doing anything.

Just be patient, they will mark it received when they get the book.

Date Posted: 8/2/2010 9:47 AM ET
Member Since: 4/7/2008
Posts: 15,690
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You should never assume that somebody hasn't marked the book received because they don't want to give you credit. As others explained, most likely she hasn't received the book. Did you sent the book with DC and it shows delivered? Even then, it could have been misdelivered or hasn't been delivered yet (it happens all the time that a book shows delivered but the USPS delivers a few days later.)

Date Posted: 8/2/2010 9:53 AM ET
Member Since: 11/14/2005
Posts: 6,421
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I would assume from her incredulous reply of "Are yo kidding me?" to mean that she can't belieive you are writing already to see if she has marked it received yet. I'm with the others in thinking that she probably hasn't gotten the book yet, and if you will wait the proper amount of time, which is stated on the order on your Main account page, you will see it get marked. If not, then we were all wrong, and it will go lost and PBS will send them a notice asking them if they received it or not. THEN when you PM her and she doesn't answer you in 5 days, you can go to PBS and let them know that she is being unresponsive and they will help you with that matter.

Date Posted: 8/2/2010 9:59 AM ET
Member Since: 8/23/2007
Posts: 26,510
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I would be annoyed to if you PM'd me that early  to ask me to mark a book received.  I agree that the response sounds like she hasn't received the book. There is a reason PBS gives 26 days for a book to travel, because sometimes they take that long. Bookmooch gives 6wks and even then you have to "remind" the person and give them a week to respond and then you have to manually mark it lost if they don't respond. 

And sometimes they actually do go lost. 

Subject: An explanation of why I PMed her so early
Date Posted: 8/2/2010 11:37 AM ET
Member Since: 10/28/2009
Posts: 47
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The reason why I PMed her so soon is because I also sent another book out that day that was received last week, so I thought that she probably already received it as well.  It just worries me about her response like I did something wrong.  And still not having any response from her since then worries me.  I appreciate all advice and will update when this is resolved.  Thank you.

Date Posted: 8/2/2010 11:51 AM ET
Member Since: 5/14/2009
Posts: 6,852
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Darcy, just wait until the book is marked lost.  Then ask her if she has received the book, if not then she needs to let you know.  Wait 5 days for a response.  If no response, send a second message and wait two days.  For a total of one week.  If she still doesn't respond, send a message to the team by clicking on Contact Us at the bottom right of the screenunder the Company Heading. 

Explain to the team the situation and that they are not responding to your PMs. The team will not  get involved in the transaction, but they do expect members to communicate with each other.

The member may not understand that you have not been a member for that long and were not aware of the procedure.  Just put this in "it was a learning experience" and move on.  If you aren't sure the process to follow, please check the help docs under the help center at the top of this page or ask your tour guide.  If your tour guide isn't available, then contact any tour guide listed under Live Help.

Date Posted: 8/2/2010 11:58 AM ET
Member Since: 8/23/2007
Posts: 26,510
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I've sent 2 books to the same area of the country on teh same day and had one arrive in a day or two and another take 3 wks.  Recently I had 2 sets of 2 books each sent from booksfree on the same day-1 arrived in 3 days (from about 2hrs from me) and the other took 2 wks.  So you can't go by what the delivery times you usually experience.

Date Posted: 8/2/2010 12:17 PM ET
Member Since: 9/13/2007
Posts: 2,520
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You did do something wrong, you should never assume that someone has received a book (not even when you have DC that says it was delivered) and you shouldn't contact to ask if the book was received until it is about to go lost. It says not to contact PBS until after that date, why shouldn't you extend the same courtesy to the receiver? No matter how friendly you worded the message, you made the assumption that she had already received the book and was withholding the credit from you for some reason. Chances are she is just as anxious to get the book as you are to get the credit. How would you have felt if she had written you and asked if you had mailed it yet? If she had assumed that since she hadn't received it yet you must not have mailed it? Should she have told you that she had not received the book yet? Yes, but I can see why she might be so baffled by your messages that she is just ignoring them now.

Was the other book that already arrived even sent to the same state? Media mail is sent on a space available basis, even going to the same state and mailed at the same time doesn't guarantee that both books are going to get on a truck going the right direction on the exact same day. 

I would advise you to write another message apologizing for jumping the gun, but since you have already sent her three I would just leave it alone. I would just not worry about it right now and patiently wait for her to receive the book and you to receive your credit. 

Last Edited on: 8/2/10 12:18 PM ET - Total times edited: 1
Date Posted: 8/2/2010 2:02 PM ET
Member Since: 10/28/2009
Posts: 47
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First off, I am not a newbie.  I have been a member for a year, and I have always PMed whomever orders my books and reminded them to mark it received.  if someone did this to me, I would not be offended.  I would not be offended if someone had asked if I mailed it either.  It is apparent to me that this member receiving the book is a newer member, and it worries me that she may not know the procedures.  No one has ever been offended by my messages before. 

Date Posted: 8/2/2010 2:18 PM ET
Member Since: 5/18/2007
Posts: 13,223
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Actually, you can see how long the person has been a member ... if they have a profile post or post in the forums. I can see you have been a member for 7 months - since Oct 28.. 9 months isn't always a lot of time to take in the nuances of this site. It depends on how many books you've sent out.

Anyhow, I would pretty much think that the person you sent the book to is an older member because that's the type of response you'd get from me. And like others have said, they'r expressing surprise you're sending them a PM so soon. Media mail does it's own thing. You can't gauge a book's path by what another one is doing. You just can't.

If you worry that much then you need to be using delivery confirmation then you can grack the book's path but even then, just becuase the PO says it's delivered, it might not be in the person's mailbox. It could have been scanned delivered at the PO or it could have been delivered to someonese accidentally.

Please don't assume someone is out to cheat you out of a credit. Odds are, in this case, they just don't have the book yet. You need to have patience and just let the system do its thing. In other words, no PMs until either goes lost or shortly before.

Last Edited on: 8/3/10 2:14 AM ET - Total times edited: 1
Date Posted: 8/2/2010 2:42 PM ET
Member Since: 8/16/2007
Posts: 15,225
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Darcy you do not have to worry about the other member not knowing what to do, the site will take care of that. It will send them reminder emails once its been long enough that the book should have been delivered so you don't need to do that too. If you sent a PM that just politely inquired whether the book was there or not, the other member shouldn't have gotten snotty even if you were jumping the gun. But, if you sent a PM insinuating that they had the book and weren't giving you the credit then they probably did have a right to get annoyed with you. 3 PMs will reach the point of being rude badgering if you have nothing but assumption to tell you it has been received. 

It is always best to assume the other member is honest and knows what to do and when to do it, to assume otherwise isn't fair to the other member and will often garner you rude responses because most members don't want to be treated like they are dishonest or stupid.

If you can't wait for books to be marked received by a member, then I do suggest using PBS-DC or PBS postage. You will get the credit on PBS-DC as soon as a USPS scan is reported to PBS and with PBS full postage you will get the credit when you mark the book mailed. That can take a lot of headache out of wondering and waiting.  

Subject: The message I sent to the receiving member
Date Posted: 8/2/2010 2:52 PM ET
Member Since: 10/28/2009
Posts: 47
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I always send the same message to members.  It is as follows:  Hi, this is just a friendly reminder to please mark the book received when you get it.  Since I handwrite the addresses, I cannot get credit until you mark it.  Thank you and enjoy. 

I don't think there is anything offensive about this, do you?

Date Posted: 8/2/2010 2:54 PM ET
Member Since: 4/7/2008
Posts: 15,690
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I have been a member for a year, and I have always PMed whomever orders my books and reminded them to mark it received.

I would stop this practice. It's not necessary as the system does this already when enough time has passed and the book hasn't been marked received. Just because something is fine with you doesn't mean that is fine with other people and I think you have now plenty of evidence from almost all the posts here that a lot of members would be from annoyed to offended from your assumption that they haven't marked received the book on purpose/or that they don't know what they are doing.

Sending 3 PMs when just  2 weeks have passed are a bit too much. You are running the risk that somebody reports you to the Team for harassment, which can jeopardize your membership.

Last Edited on: 8/2/10 2:57 PM ET - Total times edited: 3
Date Posted: 8/2/2010 2:58 PM ET
Member Since: 10/28/2009
Posts: 47
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I've never had a problem before, and I don't think sending a little message is harrassment.  After the member's response, I am not sure how to interpret this, so I did PM her a couple more times, I admit.  Now I am just waiting to see what's going to happen, but I don't think sending one message is harrassment. 

Date Posted: 8/2/2010 3:19 PM ET
Member Since: 2/13/2007
Posts: 2,276
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Stop PM'ing the member -- you might not see it as harrassment, but I am sure the other member does! You are assuming that she has the book and is not marking it received -- that is not a good attitude to approach a fellow member with, in my opinion. The system here works very well -- let the system work and do not interject yourself into it. The fact that you handwrite your labels has nothing to do with anything other than you cannot do printable postage or use the PBS DC -- lots of members handwrite their labels and do not feel obligated to pester the receiving members. You might not be harrassing anyone in your opinion, but you definitely are pestering them. Media mail takes time -- be patient and let the system take care of reminders!

Date Posted: 8/2/2010 3:22 PM ET
Member Since: 8/15/2007
Posts: 3,044
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I handwrite my addresses and have yet to have a problem with people marking them received. I never had a problem when printing the PBS wrapper either (I've only ever used DC on game books). So you really don't need to send the PM.

The first PM isn't harrassment, but continuing to PM could be considered so, which is what I think DG meant when she said you could be reported for it.

Like everyone else has said, I'd just wait until the book goes lost before doing anything else. In the future, if you really want to send a PM, wait until the week it is supposed to go lost before doing so. By then they'll have received two PBS emails anyway asking if the book has been received, but you can mention filing a lost book report with the PO as your reason for checking in. An excuse I think would be much better received than assuming they already have the book and asking to mark it received.

Date Posted: 8/2/2010 3:44 PM ET
Member Since: 2/25/2010
Posts: 388
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Darcy, it would bother me if someone sent me a PM asking me to mark the book received.  I already know to do that.  I probably wouldn't tell you after the first PM that it bothered me but it would. 

Everything will be ok.  I think that most people are pretty good about following the rules.  If you need the credit sooner, then DC confirmation would be a good idea.  When I run low on credits, that's what I do.  (which is lately.  sigh). 

Don't worry.  You'll be fine.

Date Posted: 8/2/2010 3:52 PM ET
Member Since: 1/17/2009
Posts: 10,175
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Another thing is that summer is vacation season, so everything may happen slower than you might be used to fromt he spring months. It may just take longer for books to be marked received during these months (and also for PMs to be read), as people are off doing other things, may be on vacation or on weekends away, etc. Holiday season is the same way .... very slow mail delivery combined with lots of vacations means that it can take longer for books to get marked received.

I've mailed out more than 600 (and I rarely use DC) ... and I have not had issues with people marking received. Out of that 600, I have only had 4 or 5 books even in danger of going lost, and I did PM about those, when it was close to the go lost date. I would say that within 2 weeks is about avergage for marking books reeived, though. Most of mine get marked in that 2nd week, with many many less marked received during the first and third weeks).

I also PM when someone hasn't marked a book received, but I never do it until a couple of days before the go lost date. Also, I don't assume that they have received it already. Books DO actually get lost in the mail ... it is not common, but also hardly unknown to happen.

Anyway, I usually PM something like:

"Hi, I see that "Book XXX" is going to get marked lost in the mail soon. I was wondering if you might have received it already, and if so, could you mark it received. If you have not received it yet, then I hope it gets to you soon! I can reassure you that t was mailed out on time, so hopefully you will receive it very soon.
Thanks very much,
Sara P."

Date Posted: 8/2/2010 3:56 PM ET
Member Since: 8/23/2007
Posts: 26,510
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I think you've just been lucky not have had anyone say anything before now.  Just becasue they didn't mention it doesn't mean it didn't annoy them.  I would not like snap at you in a PM but would annoy the heck out of me.  And I would express my annoyance if I got more than 1 PM.   

Date Posted: 8/2/2010 4:01 PM ET
Member Since: 10/28/2009
Posts: 47
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After this is resolved, I will consider not PMing other members.  I really don't see what the big deal is, but apparently, a lot of other people say they would be annoyed with it.  I just don't want to  leave my account fate to assuming everyone knows what to do because I fear it will turn around and bite me.

Date Posted: 8/2/2010 4:06 PM ET
Member Since: 7/31/2007
Posts: 2,695
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In the big picture here 9 months of membership is still fairly new!

Just because you "handwrite" the address does not put you at any difference than anyone else that uses a printer but, doesn't use PBS postage or DC...we don't get a credit either until the recipient receives the book and marks it as such.

As a person that gets alot of emails I don't Need another telling me or reminding me to do something (marking a book received) that I already know to do.  Personally, I probably would have just ignored your PM, since it wasn't a RWAP transaction I wouldn't be required to respond.

I have to agree that the First PM was not harassment but, the 2 follow-up ones certainly could be considered as such and if it was me I'd be contacting TPTB to tell you to back off!

Date Posted: 8/2/2010 4:22 PM ET
Member Since: 8/23/2007
Posts: 26,510
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I would at least wait until it's closer to going lost and not PM at just 2 wks.