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Topic: Moral objection to requestor

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Subject: Moral objection to requestor
Date Posted: 1/27/2008 12:06 PM ET
Member Since: 7/29/2006
Posts: 240
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Let's say someone requests a book from you and you are taking a peek at their wishlist.  They happen to be requesting a book that you disagree with (let's say pro-life or gay rights, any controversial political issue).  I know I shouldn't let this bother me, but it's an issue I feel very strongly about.  On top of that, I get suspicious of requestors who have very strict conditions, I'm always afraid they are selling my books, ruining the purpose of the club.

Date Posted: 1/27/2008 12:16 PM ET
Member Since: 10/24/2007
Posts: 1,313
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The beauty of PBS is that you can choose to trade (or not trade) with whomever you want.  Personally, I'm not going to check out someone's wish list to make sure our morals align.  But, to each his own.

Date Posted: 1/27/2008 12:28 PM ET
Member Since: 2/5/2007
Posts: 30,804
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People would have to work VERY hard to get enough books to make it worthwhile to sell.    I agree with Amy - you don't have to send to anyone if you choose not to.   Just be aware that if you cancel out an order - you lose your FIFO place in line.      I never even think about seeing what other books someone has.   Sending or getting a book from them has nothing to do with them personally!!!  But if it bothers you - decline.

Date Posted: 1/27/2008 12:29 PM ET
Member Since: 6/2/2007
Posts: 527
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Last Edited on: 1/21/09 10:22 PM ET - Total times edited: 4
Date Posted: 1/27/2008 12:33 PM ET
Member Since: 1/21/2008
Posts: 158
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I for one, read a lot of books. Some are on subjects that I do not personally agree with, but I do like to know about things. The only way to really disagree is to make an informed decision. Conditions..I don't know about, I have never really been worried about that. Just keep in mind that just because someone wants to read a particular book DOES NOT mean that they agree with whatever the subject or viewpoint is.

Date Posted: 1/27/2008 12:34 PM ET
Member Since: 4/22/2007
Posts: 2,461
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Refusing books because of supposed moral stances is lame but do it if you want to.

Date Posted: 1/27/2008 12:35 PM ET
Member Since: 12/21/2006
Posts: 315
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I want all the books on my bookshelf to go to someone who will enjoy reading them, or at least find them very interesting.

Date Posted: 1/27/2008 12:36 PM ET
Member Since: 6/13/2007
Posts: 905
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I guess I look at it this way.....

just because someone has a certain book on their wishlist it doesn't mean that it is for them. I request books for friends and family members and they may have completely different tastes than I do.  besides, I think that everyone has the right to their own opinions/tastes about things and so I don't really care what others want to read.

abouth requestor conditions and book sellers..I doubt that someone could make  a killing selling books they receive from here...credits to get books do cost in the long run whether you purchase them outright or send out books yourself for them. but I guess it's possible there are some that do. I'm just not going to waste time thinking about why someone has certain rq's...just if my book fits theirs and I can send it.

that being said, you have every right to turn down any request you get for any reason.

Date Posted: 1/27/2008 12:38 PM ET
Member Since: 2/21/2007
Posts: 3,086
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You can't judge a person by his bookshelf. 

Nor too much by his WL even, though it may give a more accurate representation of reading habits than bookshelf.

I personally have both Ben Stein and Henry Rollins on my WL.  I don't know how that would look to someone or how they would judge me for it. 

I could have one of the two fellows on the WL for a friend or relative, or I may be interested in what each of them have to say, even though they are about 180° apart on most issues.  You can never tell just by looking.

That said, feel free to decline any request that makes you uncomfortable.  You don't need to justify it.  I'm a big believer in not doing something that makes you uncomfortable if you don't have to.  One thing to remember, though, is if you refuse a request for a book for any reason other than requestor conditions, the book is removed from your shelf, and you will have to repost it and go to the back of the FIFO line.

Date Posted: 1/27/2008 1:12 PM ET
Member Since: 4/20/2006
Posts: 5,743
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It's your choice of course, but I don't think you are going to change the world by denying someone books.  You certainly aren't going to change that particular person or punish them somehow.  They'll just get if from the next person.

Date Posted: 1/27/2008 1:32 PM ET
Member Since: 10/27/2005
Posts: 503
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Never judge someone by their shelf is my policy. My shelf has Vampire and religious books what would that make you think about me?

The religious books I rescued from someone who was getting ready to throw them in the garbage dumpster. Even though I don't read them I figured someone else might so I brought them home and posted them.

Date Posted: 1/27/2008 1:32 PM ET
Member Since: 5/18/2007
Posts: 13,223
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I never thought someone could be judging my morals by my wishlist?!?! 

Personally, I think it's a pretty harsh and judgmental thing to do. I know everyone has their own opinions and aren't always going to agree with mine. My best friend and daughter are total opposites in some very sticky issues. I trade books with them all the time.  Do all your friends agree with you in all issues?  And do you refuse friendships based on who sits on what side of the fence on an issue?

As for RC, I don't think too many people on here are sellers. Most sellers by books in volumes not a book here or there on a shelf. But too many RC leads me to refuse sometimes because I feel that my book, no matter how nice it is, won't measure up to the book they are envisioning.

Date Posted: 1/27/2008 1:36 PM ET
Member Since: 7/29/2005
Posts: 641
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I have also posted and wish listed books that I don't necessarily agree with. ( and I have some things on my WL that others may find offensive -Yaoi anyone?)

I try not to overthink it.

Edited for spelling. 

Last Edited on: 1/27/08 7:40 PM ET - Total times edited: 1
Date Posted: 1/27/2008 1:43 PM ET
Member Since: 1/21/2008
Posts: 158
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I really hadn't thought about any of the books that I had posted until now. I have quite a few romance novels and I don't read romance. I buy some books in bulk at garge sales, read what I want and until now, just passed on everything else. I also have political books, some strange fiction..Oh brother, I read just about everything. That does not make me a bad person. I really don't get this

Date Posted: 1/27/2008 1:57 PM ET
Member Since: 7/23/2005
Posts: 7,523
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I don't think you can tell much about anyone from looking at their bookshelf or their WL.  Only a handful of the books on my WL are actually for me.  The rest are on there in the hope that I'll get them to send to deployed troops.   The same goes for my bookshelf.  I've read very few of the books I have posted. I read mostly history and also send those books  to the troops. Like others have said, I rely on garage sales, donations from friends and thrift stores to stock my shelf. 

No offense meant, but I really don't get it either.  Do you want it to work both ways?  Say someone looks at your WL or your bookshelf and makes assumptions about you.  Would you really not want people to request your books based on those assumptions?

That said, it certainly is up to you to decide who you want to trade with.  It just seems to go against the spirit of PBS.



Date Posted: 1/27/2008 2:12 PM ET
Member Since: 1/10/2008
Posts: 345
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How can you tell who requests the book before you accept it?  I'm sorry, but I don't have any current requests that I haven't reponded to to see what it looks like.  You can't PM the person before the request is accepted -- so how do you know who it is? 

Date Posted: 1/27/2008 3:15 PM ET
Member Since: 8/27/2005
Posts: 4,136
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I also obtain many books from library sales and thrift stores to post, so my reading interests can't be ascertained by my bookshelf.  On the other hand, if I were to see a book at the FOL sale that I vehemently disagreed with, I probably wouldn't buy it to post even if I thought someone were looking for it--not wanting to spread the message, so to speak.  But I don't think you can be sure of someone's stance on a subject from either their bookshelf OR their wishlist, so I wouldn't cancel a trade with anyone. 

Date Posted: 1/27/2008 3:20 PM ET
Member Since: 3/6/2006
Posts: 3,070
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Half the books on my shelf I haven't read, got em at FOL sales or were given to me to post here.  I also have WL books that will be going to other people once I'm first in line.

Date Posted: 1/27/2008 3:31 PM ET
Member Since: 12/28/2007
Posts: 445
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this is funny b/c there are some books on my shelf that im getting rid of just b/c i disagree with them. if you look at any of the parenting books i am selling, i am not keeping them for a reason.  if there any politrical books on my shelf, i am probably in disagreement with them.  BUT if you look at my WL, well, yeh..those are books i want and very much would LOVE to have from anyone, whether or not they agree with me.

if someone doesnt want to send me a book based on my WL though, i guess thats their perogative.

Date Posted: 1/27/2008 3:32 PM ET
Member Since: 7/2/2006
Posts: 1,620
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I'm sure I wouldn't receive or send many books if PBS worked this way.  :)

Date Posted: 1/27/2008 4:15 PM ET
Member Since: 12/3/2005
Posts: 3,394
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Personally, I feel that judging someone based upon their bookshelf or wishlist is "ruining the purpose of the club".  The purpose of the club is to swap books, period.  I know several book sellers in RL and honestly they would never even consider using PBS as a resource.  For personal reading, sure, but to find that long lost $100 edition of something, not gonna happen.  Most requestor conditions are health related or simply personal preference.  If someone has overly picky RCs it is usually that same person who is in the produce section for half an hour inspecting each and every item they pick up.

Ellie (EllieW) - ,
Date Posted: 1/27/2008 4:22 PM ET
Member Since: 3/5/2007
Posts: 1,479
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No, it doesn't bother me in the least what other's interests, moral stances, or political beliefs are. And I don't care if other people agree or disagree with mine. To each his own. I usually check out the bookshelf and wishlist of those who order from me, but only to see if they have something I'm looking for, or to see if I have a book in my TBR pile that they might be looking for.

Date Posted: 1/27/2008 4:46 PM ET
Member Since: 2/16/2006
Posts: 1,956
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Since you can't see who your books are going to before you accept the request, if you didn't want to send books to people with different beliefs than you, then the only thing you could do about it would be to cancel the request.  If you did that frequently, you would put your membership in jeopardy. Not worth it, in my opinion.

Date Posted: 1/27/2008 5:11 PM ET
Member Since: 1/9/2006
Posts: 760
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Seriously?  You would judge someone by their bookshelf or WL?   Man, I'd be in trouble if that were true.  This place seems to have a great deal of very conservative Christians. I guess I need to check to make sure I only order from other pagans?

Date Posted: 1/27/2008 5:17 PM ET
Member Since: 10/20/2007
Posts: 1,680
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I wouldn't want to be judged by what's on my wishlist.  I have many different interests and am very curious about so many things that some would find objectionable.

Why not just order books that you prefer to read and not worry where its coming from?  As long the book meets PBS guidelines, another persons values should not even be a considedration (in my humble opinion).