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Topic: Are you 'out of the broom closet' in real life?

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Subject: Are you 'out of the broom closet' in real life?
Date Posted: 5/4/2008 9:57 PM ET
Member Since: 8/28/2006
Posts: 462
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For me, my father's side of the family knows all about me and we talk a lot and I don't have to worry tha tany of them will jump on their pedestals..so that is cool...


However, my stepmom's side of the family is very strictly catholic...so the few that do know (stepmom, sister, coupla aunts, and an uncle) don't talk about it in front of other family members that will cause problems...


So, I guess you could say that I am 3/4 of the way out...It was pretty easy for me with the family that does know because I know how tolerant they are of others...and I know a lot of the people in my stepmom's side would cause huge problems...I don't see them that often though..so it isn't really a big deal...and I don't care what they think, I just don't want to get harrassed or have my daughter subjected to it..


Has anyone had any problems dealing with family or friends?  I sure hope not, it isn't fun...my SO has issues with my beliefs..and that has been a challenge..but he knew me well before he asked me out, so if he isn't happy it's his problem!  I am not changing who I am to make him more comfy...been there, done that with the ex-h...never again.

T. -
Date Posted: 5/4/2008 11:18 PM ET
Member Since: 1/21/2007
Posts: 9,989
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I've considered myself pagan for many years, and a few of those years I was Wiccan, altho I don't claim that label now.  I have always been "out of the closet," so to speak.  Even when I was teaching school--I didn't run around proclaiming I was a pagan, but I didn't hide it either.  Yep, I had a couple of parents who didn't like their child having a pagan teacher, but for the most part I didn't have any problems.  The Christian teachers always invited me to their lunchtime prayer meetings and I always said thanks for the invite and that was that.

My parents and family never had a problem either.  They believe I am intelligent enough to decide what to believe, even if it doesn't align with what my family has believed for generations.  Both my daughters were raised pagan, and altho they don't practice Wicca anymore, either, they are very in tune with both pagan and New Age issues.

My advice to anyone--live your life as who you are--I think Shakespeare said it well--To thine own self be true. 

Today's climate on alternative religions is so much better than it was even 10 years ago.  Being pagan is nothing to be ashamed of or to hide. 

L. G. (L)
Date Posted: 5/5/2008 2:23 AM ET
Member Since: 9/5/2005
Posts: 12,412
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I'm Unitarian-Universalist with semi-NeoPagan leanings - I was raised to choose my own religion, and we are doing the same with my DS who is 4. 

My family is cool with whatever anyone wants to believe, but with DH's family, we have a don't-ask-don't tell relationship, of sorts.  DH's Mom and her family are *very* religious, non-denominal Christian - as in they attend church multiple times a week and read bibles at home.  They had DH reciting scripture at the pulpit at age 3 - and I'm not joking.  He's a recovering Christian because of it, and very private about matters of religion. 

So MIL will try to "push" religious toys, books, CDs, etc. on DS, and we make nice-nice with her on matters of religion, but don't really use the items at home other than in a  "this is a nice story" sort of way, because we feel he's simply to young to understand the implications.  When she visits, I take her to a Christian church, although I have vowed that next time I will take her to a UU church or a Friend's meeting, as I sometimes attend the local Friend's church.  I sort of feel like a hypocrite not divulging our true status, but in DH's eyes, his Mom is better off not knowing the full truth. She's a very kind and decent woman - and never too "pushy"- but it would probably disturb her to learn that we don't consider ourselves Christian in a true sense of the word. (We value Jesus' teachings - we simply don't acknowledge any savior.)


Date Posted: 5/5/2008 9:25 AM ET
Member Since: 8/28/2006
Posts: 462
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we have a don't-ask-don't tell relationship, of sorts


That is the perfect way of describing it...I don't hide mybeliefs...but I don't flaunt them either....I was raised Catholic in a very strict Catholic family...it was kinda crazy...while I never had to recite scripture..I can sympathize with your DH...I think it will save you a lot of grief in the long run..In my case I don't talk to certain people about my beliefs because I do not want open myself or my daughter up to harrassment....I agree with Tammy tho...the collective attitude is way better nowadays then it used to be....we don't have to worry anymore about being burned at the stake, ect for being witches/heretics/whatever...;)