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So someone ordered a book from me, and I had another similar book that I felt was unpostable because it's a little worn so I threw it in for free and sent BOTH books off to her....SHE RWAP as INCORRECT BOOK with a nasty note "I only wanted X, I have no need of Y"
I even included a note in the package saying it was a freebie!
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I'm sorry, that's really unfortunate. I would send her a note asking her nicely to indicate that it was marked RWAP in error, since she did in fact get the book that she wanted. If she doesn't respond I would contact the site owners, she had no busniess marking this a problem transaction. |
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Wow -I have done that several times with a note - unpostable it is free and I try to match it up with the same genre they are requesting. Just Wow. However she can't RWAP it for incorrect book because she did receive the book she requested. I would PM her and let ther know she can only mark RWAP on the book she requested and received if there is a problem with the book. If the book she requested and received is ok then she needs to go to the transaction archive and mark the book marked RWAP as a mistake. Sorry this happened to you.
ETA: Liesl was faster! Last Edited on: 9/12/09 10:08 PM ET - Total times edited: 1 |
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Oh, wow. That is just so rude. I would do what Liesl suggested, definitely. What a jerk! |
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what a crab. |
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Well in the receivers defense: I might not appreciate an unpostable freebie like that if it was a book I already owned or had read. I have 600 books already adn the last thing I need is an unpostable I didn't really want. Then it would be a book I had to decide what to do with. But to mark it RWP was uncalled for. She could have just sent a PM asking you not to do that again if you were ever sending her a book. |
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Unbelievably rude!! |
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RWAP was uncalled for, but the requestor might have felt you were treating them like a trashcan for your unpostable & unwanted books. :( |
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Yet another case of someone improperly using RWAP in order to punish someone else for annoying or inconveniencing them. Even if it was against the rules, they'd still be improperly marking a book RWAP. Personally, I'd just throw an unwanted book in the trash or donate it & if I said anything at all, it would be something like "thanks for being so thoughtful, but I really don't need more books than I request:P" and that would be the end of it. Sending a nasty note to someone who was only trying to be nice is rude. This person intentionally misused the RWAP procedure as a snitty little b!&@slap at someone who annoyed them in some way. I seriously doubt that it's there for that purpose & I'd let tptb know about it. Last Edited on: 9/13/09 11:06 AM ET - Total times edited: 1 |
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GAH. This irks me to no end! Last month, I ordered 6 books from someone in a Book Bazaar deal. They included a 7th, an ARC (I know it's not postable here, but, once I'm done with it, I'll be more than happy to list it on another site, donate it to UBS or FOL, or just pass it on to a friend), which I was really happy to receive as a bonus. It was just another example of the generosity and kindness of PBS members and it hurts me that someone would RWAP and be nasty about such a thing.
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Marking RWAP was not warranted and being rude certainly wasn't a correct way to handle the situation but I would not want to receive someone's unpostable either. That would irritate me but not enugh to retaliate. That's a little silly!
Like someone else said here, I have so many books that the ones I order or buy are the ones I only want. And another unpostable that I might have already read? No thanks! However, I have asked someone via PM BEFORE mailing, if they want Book X and then toss it in if they do. And I've had that done with me, as well. That might be a better solution for generosity. Or at least then it can't be negatively received. Last Edited on: 9/13/09 1:57 PM ET - Total times edited: 1 |
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. Last Edited on: 5/2/11 7:06 PM ET - Total times edited: 1 |
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I wouldn't RWAP over this, but I wouldn't be happy receiving something I didn't order. I really think you should ask before sending.
I have a difficult time keeping the clutter down in my house, being four pack-rats live here (it's genetic). An unwanted book would just make something else I had to get rid of. I can't throw something out that someone else may want, so I try not to bring anything in that I don't want to keep. Yeah, I could donate it, but I'm already surrounded by my own junk that I need to organize into keep/get-rid-of piles. Don't send me anything else, please. |
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Shoot, just this week I received a package with an unasked for book. An author I wouldn't normally read. It wasn't an unpostable, true but even if it was I would not have marked it RWAP - I didn't ask for it! Either throw the book away, donate it, take it to a UBS or as Stacey said take it with you and leave it somewhere. Great idea I never thought of that. To be nasty about it was just plain - nasty! To mark the book request RWAP - nasty!
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Wow. I'm sorry she did that to you. It sounds petty and rude. |
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Wow! I can't imagine anyone doing that to another member! Personally, I'd be grateful and thankful that another member thought enough of me to go to the expense to add in another book that I might like. To me, it's the thoughtfulness that counts. |
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Wow - now I am rethinking including non-requested books again. When I received multiple requests from a member, when I am packing the box if there is room that needs to be filled I would do it by inlcuding books (if I have non-postables, sometimes I would use a postable and once a non-postable WL, and usually of the same genre of the books being requesed). I wouldn't PM the member because I am packing and sealing the box which is usually the night before. Also then you are in the trap - no one likes to be PM'd. Now I think I will fill the extra space in with paper - the intent was never to have another member become angry or upset over the gesture but to provide a little surprise. I guess I am only sharing with my buddies going forward. I feel like someone just rained on my parade.
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Please don't let one ungrateful, rude person end your generous spirit. How many have you sent as an extra and NOT had a problem? DO NOT please let her rain on your parade. That is letting the rude person tell you how to act. That simply in not acceptable, in my opinion. |
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Cozi - thanks for your comments. I wasn't referring to the rude person the OP encountered but to the comments left on this thread [no one was being rude just their opinions on how they would feel]. In a million years I never thought anyone would be upset receiving a non-requested book. If I received one, I would think it a very nice gesture and thank the member. If I didn't want it - there are tons of places to donate - my hair salon has a bookshelf you can choose from while there and if you get into the book you can borrow it for awhile. I like the idea of leaving it somewhere -there is no great effort. Knowing that members would actually be put off or upset by this, has me rethinking who I would do this for in the future. The intent is for it to be a surprise, something unexpected not to potentially upset the person receiving the book. It is suppose to be fun-as far as I am concerned. Since it is impossible to tell who would and wouldn't be offended it is better not to send anything not requested. Unless agreed when the book is requested and accepted. I will still do this for my buddies, if I swap with a member often or you since you made it clear you would be appreciate the gesture, but I don't think I will do it randomly anymore. I know this is a small percentage of the membership, but I am sure many more feel the same. I think everyone should be happy when they open their package. |
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I've gotten these little toss in freebies that I didn't request, know about, or want, and even though I was kinda sighing about what I was going to do with this book I didn't want, it never once occured to me to retaliate in some way. Like head noogies for being such a knucklehead and sending me an extra book:P Seems silly to me, childish actually to get pissed over it. Acts like that, when they annoy or inconvenience, are something to roll your eyes over, but mark a transaction RWAP? WTH for? Sheesh. I think some people take the little things waaay too seriously. Last Edited on: 9/13/09 11:10 PM ET - Total times edited: 1 |
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I'd consider an extra book a well-meaning but slightly irritating act. I'd PM a simple "thank you" and donate it someplace, but it would be annoying "mind clutter" until I got rid of it. (I could never just "toss" a book unless it was really moldy or something). To respond to a nice gesture with a rude PM is uncalled-for and a RWAP is utterly ridiculous. |
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Wow, this thread was really eye opening. I often include freebies in packages I send out, especially the packages of children's books and/or when I have unpostables in the same series as a book order. I have always gotten very nice thank yous from the recipients. Obviously I will have to rethink this practice. |
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I have sent freebies before, however I have always PMed the requestor in advance to find out if they want the freebie book. I haven't had anyone turn me down, but I still think it's the best way to go, especially if the book is unpostable. Just say something like "since you are interested in X book, I also have Y book that is similar so I thought you might like it as a freebie. It is unpostable due to yadda yadda, but if you would like it please let me know and I will be happy to include it for free." If you do not hear back from them, don't send the freebie. Edited to add, the RWAP was completely uncalled for, as was the rudeness. Even if it was a book I did not want, I would still consider the spirit in which it was sent, which was kindness and generosity. I do hope that they will resolve the RWAP for you. Last Edited on: 9/14/09 1:43 PM ET - Total times edited: 1 |
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It is funny to learn how totally different people's reactions can be from your own. I remember learning in another thread my failure to send a "thank you" PM to each person who sent me a book might be causing distress. It had never occured to me that folks expected that. I'd send a thank you in special cases but not for routine transactions. I know better now. I'm feeling bad for my part in casting a pall on those that enjoy giving thoughtful gestures with their shipments. Please keep in mind that I'm likely in the crabby minority and most people are genuinely thankful for your kindness! |
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I don't think you're crabby, Tracy. Likely there is a fairly even balance of people who feel like it's Christmas & people who don't want to deal with what to do with one more book. Totally relate to what you said about "mind clutter". I don't like to toss books out either, but I am generally a busy person & I don't always have time to drop things off at Goodwill or wherever. I suppose I could leave some at the Dr's office. Goodness knows I've been in enough of those lately:P Everyone's priorities are different; like I'm currently trying to clear out books & de-clutter in general, and there are lots of others who would be tickled pink to get an unexpected surprise. I often sent sequels along with ordered books when I had BOB & everyone who got them seemed thrilled. I think the one thing that remains constant is good manners though. Even those who just don't need anymore books seem to agree that it's bad manners to bawl someone out for a thoughtful gesture & just plain wrong to mark a transaction RWAP because of it. |
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