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Topic: Refused a wish list book for too many restrictions

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Subject: Refused a wish list book for too many restrictions
Date Posted: 4/5/2011 10:10 PM ET
Member Since: 9/21/2008
Posts: 3
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I was notified of a wish list book that became available to me & I accepted the offer.  I recieved this the next day in reply

Cannot mail book

"requestor has too many restrictions on books she
will receive. I personally wouldn't send a book
that wasn't in pristine condition. I don't think
anyone else would either,so why would you have to
make a request that a book be in good conditon."


Here is a copy of my conditions (yes, I have copied from other members as fed up as I from receiving less than perfect books)


It's a shame to have to make so many stipulations regarding what I will accept, but too often the books I've received have not been enjoyable to read due to it's sad condition.


- It is coming from a smoking household, or smells like wet dog, or mold.

- If the books have excessive damage to them i.e. torn or frayed pages, a cover that is fraying and bent to excess, no water damage.  If you would be happy receiving this book in the condition it is, then I would be too.

- If the book has tape on it. I do not want a book that has been taped back together. Nor do I want a book that has had tape on it so when I remove it, it is sticky.

Thank you for your understanding after all I wouldn't send a book like this to you....

Too many conditions?  Really??? If the book offered met these conditons what gives the sender the right to deny my request?  I can not find this as an option for sending or not sending a book anywhere in the book club if the book MEETS the conditons. Why would we be allowed to list conditons if that wasn't alright?

I would welcome hearing others opinions on this matter.  Has anyone else been denied a book for having "too many conditions"?

Date Posted: 4/5/2011 10:26 PM ET
Member Since: 8/23/2007
Posts: 26,510
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I hate to say it but I would probably turn them down as well. I buy a lot of books from Target and Borders and they usually have stickers ont hem which I remove and sometimes leave residue.  And this feels like you are shouting at me: DO NOT SEND ME A BOOK IF

I would turn it down anyway because I have dogs. 

I know this isn't part of your condition but the fact that you say you are tired of receiving "less than perfect books' sounds picky to me.  Books don't even come brand new in perfect condition. 

Last Edited on: 4/5/11 10:33 PM ET - Total times edited: 1
Date Posted: 4/5/2011 10:32 PM ET
Member Since: 12/31/2009
Posts: 3,995
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To be perfecly honest, I wouldn't accept either. And it wouldn't be because I want to annoy you. The reason I'd decline is because when I see RCs like that, I am afraid that I may have to deal with a person that will RWAP any book that is not perfect according to their personal criteria. I'd simply rather decline and send it to someone else.

I know getting unpostable books is a real pain. I get them relatively often myself. But, repeating the site's standing rules in an RC is just making your RCs unnecessarily long. You already have the right to RWAP a book for those reasons, so restating them isn't needed and comes off as sounding angry. I personally would be scared to send a book to someone that is scolding me for something I didn't even have a chance to do yet.

Date Posted: 4/5/2011 10:35 PM ET
Member Since: 7/23/2005
Posts: 7,427
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Just as requestors can have RCs, senders can turn them down for any reason.  I've read here that some members turn down any RC, regardless of what it is.

Personally, I work with RCs.  I figure that most people have them because they've been burned by receiving unpostable books.  Your RC lost me at the smoking thing because I smoke.

Honestly, though, I found your RC to be a little off-putting.  I know that you didn't intend it to be, but the all caps in the first line kind of threw me and the bit in the last line about how you wouldn't send a bad book might sound just a tad bit snarky, depending on my own mood. It's hard to interpret the written word sometimes.

I also think that your sender must be a new member or incredibly lucky if she hasn't received a nasty book yet, let alone one that isn't in pristine condition!

Date Posted: 4/5/2011 10:36 PM ET
Member Since: 12/10/2009
Posts: 2,512
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You have the right to have any RC that you want  and they have a right to turn it down. I know that you just want a reasonably nice book . If your RC is no longer working for you , perhaps you could edit it down a little bit.  I have no RCs' and so far only 1 book with some water damage.

Date Posted: 4/5/2011 10:40 PM ET
Member Since: 1/17/2009
Posts: 9,960
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I think you can boil down your RCs to this:

Please, no books with tape on them, or from smoking homes. Thanks very much!

I think your RC sounds a lot like a lecture, which most people won't appreciate. (I would still send you a book anyway, but then I accept all RCs if I am able and don't worry too much about the tone of the RC.)

Date Posted: 4/5/2011 10:41 PM ET
Member Since: 9/8/2009
Posts: 621
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I would turn it down also. #1 - Some of it is subjective #2 - It sounds angry. Subjective + angry = likely RWAP.
Date Posted: 4/5/2011 11:25 PM ET
Member Since: 8/15/2007
Posts: 3,044
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I'd have to decline because of smell. 

And I agree about it seeming like you're yelling with all caps. Maybe just cap the word "not" instead of doing the whole intro phrase.

Date Posted: 4/5/2011 11:44 PM ET
Member Since: 7/19/2008
Posts: 15,476
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I'm sorry.  With a RC, you are asking me for a favor.  Your RC has the wrong tone.  I agree with the others, it needs editing.

Date Posted: 4/6/2011 1:33 AM ET
Member Since: 2/26/2009
Posts: 36,315
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I agree with the others.  Your tone is very off-putting.  I'd rather not deal with it.

Date Posted: 4/6/2011 3:01 AM ET
Member Since: 1/1/2009
Posts: 1,924
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 PBS gives us all the right to turn down an RC for any reason, including I don't like the tone of your RC and I think that sums up what that person was saying.

Date Posted: 4/6/2011 6:00 AM ET
Member Since: 8/30/2008
Posts: 2,207
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you would be happy receiving this book in the condition it is, then I would be too.

I think this comment is very subjective - while I like receiving 'pristine' books I'm not all that picky unless the book is falling apart. I want to read the book, not add it to a 'collection' or give it away, etc., or even worry about reposting it, where condition would matter. This RC tells me someone wouldn't be happy if I sent a book that I could be happy with.

Virtually all the books on my shelf are like new, never read, or very gently read once, but I'm a self-admitted decliner of most RCs, don't need the credit badly enough to go through the hassle of a RWAP.



Date Posted: 4/6/2011 7:51 AM ET
Member Since: 8/10/2005
Posts: 4,601
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If an RC is short and to the point, I happily accept. I don't even bother to read excessively long ones, which IMO, yours is. Also, any that have a sort of 'angry' tone, or sound put out, etc...well, that's an auto-decline. I have no need to know why you're making these requests, just tell me plainly, simply AND BRIEFLY, what you want.

However, I would refuse after reading the first line because to me, asking me to judge the "smell" of something is subjective--my nose may be different than yours, my dog (if I had one) might smell differently when it's wet than yours does, etc. Too easy to get stung on those that ask for an interpretation like that.


Date Posted: 4/6/2011 8:59 AM ET
Member Since: 5/9/2010
Posts: 13
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I'd decline it too, smell is so subjective, especially when a lot of people aren't the book's first owner.  I have dogs, do my books smell like dogs? I don't think so...but maybe someone else would.  I agree with the others that the tone sounds angry too, I wouldn't want to risk a RWAP, and if it's a wishlist book the person with the book has many other options without having to worry if you're going to RWAP their book.  


As far as being "tired of receiving less than perfect books" if you want perfect, buy new.  I can understand decent condition, readable condtion, POSTABLE condition...but less than perfect? That might be asking a bit too much I think.

Date Posted: 4/6/2011 9:46 AM ET
Member Since: 3/27/2009
Posts: 1,516
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Sorry, but I would decline as well.  Too subjective and demanding sounding.

Date Posted: 4/6/2011 10:47 AM ET
Member Since: 8/16/2007
Posts: 15,201
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 If you would be happy receiving this book in the condition it is, then I would be too.

 You void your whole RC with this line. One of the most common excuses for sending a bad book is "I received it that way and was fine with it so you should be too."


Change the tone. You are lecturing someone who hasn't done anything wrong.

Remove and subjective words like excessive - I know what I think is excessive, but what do you think is excessive? Smells are also tough, what if the sender didn't smell anything, but you do?

A member has every right to turn down an RC. Any RCs concerning condition run the risk of the loss of a credit and no member is required to take that risk.

Date Posted: 4/6/2011 11:31 AM ET
Member Since: 7/12/2010
Posts: 4,177
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Nope, wouldn't accept. Don't like the tone, plus I always try to remove any stickers on a book (along with the sticky residue), sometimes I might miss a smidge (a very precise unit of measure), so I would violate your RC.


Date Posted: 4/6/2011 12:01 PM ET
Member Since: 2/13/2007
Posts: 2,272
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Have to agree with the others...would not accept your RC -- it feels like borrowing trouble! I try to work with RCs but this one seems a little too militant for me to be happy with. Plus, anytime someone says "smells like" I am usually going to reject it because it is just too subjective. Not to mention, it is way too long -- short, sweet, concise usually works.

Sianeka - ,
Date Posted: 4/6/2011 12:15 PM ET
Member Since: 2/8/2007
Posts: 6,630
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I try to work with RCs, since I have one myself, but I'd need to decline because I know my sense of smell isn't as acute as some, and I can't reliably accept any conditions that ask me to make a "smell" judgement.  I have to decline subjective odor RCs...

Edited to add:  All members have the right to add any RCs to their request that they want, and as a result, any member has the right to decline an RC for any reason (or even for no reason).

Last Edited on: 4/6/11 12:16 PM ET - Total times edited: 1
Date Posted: 4/6/2011 12:51 PM ET
Member Since: 9/21/2008
Posts: 3
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Well Blimy!  thanks for your input everyone!  I will change my RC to read a bit more friendly - I certainly didn't mean to offend.  

I've never RWAP'ed a book or caused anyone to loose a credit I just have received some that were less than acceptable and know others have too.

I DO buy books new and swap them after reading them once - often

thanks again all for your thoughts 

Date Posted: 4/6/2011 3:26 PM ET
Member Since: 2/14/2010
Posts: 44
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I have received over 200 books, I can count on one hand the ones that were unpostable.  Some are more worn than others. I refuse to pass on some of the books because they are not in a condition I would like to receive even thou they are postable.  I don't have a problem being the person sunsetting some books. 

when I read some RCs, I get the impression they only want perfect books and to me thats not fair to everyone so I decline those RCs even if I have a brand new book to send.  Books wear out and  I think everyone should have their fair share of books that they are the final person to read them and for that reason I would decline your RC.  JMHO, YMMV.

Date Posted: 4/6/2011 4:24 PM ET
Member Since: 1/5/2007
Posts: 145
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I would turn down that RC too.  It's good you'll rewrite the RC to something friendlier.  I had an RC recently that I accepted even though it was long.  The woman who wrote it did it in such a way that it was very polite and friendly.  Sometimes the tone of the RC is what leads me to decline it rather than the specific condtion in the RC.

I don't have an RC.  I guess I've been lucky in that over 250+ swaps, I haven't received an unpostable book.  I realize it happens to others and I fully understand why others have RCs, but I tend to decline wordy RCs or RCs that give me the impression the person is very picky.