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Topic: WHY would someone do this?

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Subject: WHY would someone do this?
Date Posted: 8/20/2008 11:26 PM ET
Member Since: 7/23/2007
Posts: 267
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I have been waiting for a book that was "mailed" on the 24th of July.  I was starting to get concerned, because I have gotten 3 of those emails that say "has such and such book arrived yet".  I thought oh no, my first missing in action book.  Every day my daughter asked if it came yet, and I told her no I think it may be lost.  Today it comes in the mail, and I look at the date on the stamp and it says Aug. 15th!!  That is 3 weeks after they said it was sent.  Why on earth would someone mark a book mailed and then not mail it for 3 weeks????

Date Posted: 8/20/2008 11:29 PM ET
Member Since: 8/13/2008
Posts: 13,147
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Because they need to be slapped? Grrr, that's annoying!

Date Posted: 8/20/2008 11:32 PM ET
Member Since: 2/5/2007
Posts: 30,804
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Some people can't be bothered to read or follow the rules.  Thankfully it's a small percentage on here.

Date Posted: 8/20/2008 11:42 PM ET
Member Since: 1/25/2007
Posts: 6,567
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I agree it is rude & annoying. It is so much worse when kids are hurt by people who lie.

Hopefully you filled in the form after marking it recieved. You can put in the post mark date showing they lied about then make a note in the bottom to show the site owners about it.

This happened to me on a BOX O BOOKS. My middle daughter was waiting for some books I had picked out for her in trade. I mailed my books right away and the woman marked hers mailed a day later.

She got my books and marked them recived. I waited and waited. I contacted her and got some lame excuse saying she hadn't mailed them yet. I pointed out that she had marked them mailed on so & so date. She told me they went out and I kept waiting. Again still no books and she said "Oh they are sitting on my counter. They will go out today."

I was ready to scream honestly. I mean I can't stand lying but why do it to this point? I had told her up front the books were for my little girl and she couldn't wait to get them. A lot of people I swap with are moms & I usually make friends with them.

I checked out her profile and this woman too was a mom, but I just got sick knowing she'd be willing lie to a child.

When we finally got them in the mail my little girl said "FINALLY!!!" Then we both saw the date and my little girl said 'This was mailed 3 days ago."

It is sad to explain to a child how a grown up lies. My 6yr old son said "She needs to go to jail!"

Date Posted: 8/20/2008 11:53 PM ET
Member Since: 7/23/2007
Posts: 267
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Ashley, I know what you mean. Some people lie like it is a normal part of everyday life.  You wonder where their conscience is.

Date Posted: 8/21/2008 1:35 AM ET
Member Since: 7/20/2007
Posts: 1,046
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I have a book about to go lost in 5 days now, i think. I'm getting annoyed. Not only do i hate waiting so long, but it was the ONLY book of its kind in the system. *sniffle*

Date Posted: 8/21/2008 2:35 AM ET
Member Since: 12/9/2007
Posts: 9,601
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I can think of only one way this would legitimately occur.  I rely on my sons and DH to mail things for me.  I do buy printed postage and DC.  Once in a while they have been known to take the books and forget to mail them so they sit in their cars.  It's frustrating - so I've learned to choose the absolute latest deadline to mail and choose the latest possible "postmark" on the wrapper.  This means that there is some safety net built in.  But I also now ask them if they were able to mail the books every time I see them after I've given them the books.  The one time it did happen I did PM the requestor and tell them what had happened.  It was embarrassing.  But it wasn't as long a period of time as this one.


Date Posted: 8/21/2008 7:43 AM ET
Member Since: 7/31/2007
Posts: 2,695
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OK, there is one other explanation...though it doesn't vindicate the sender from not sending you a PM.  I just received 3 books that had gone lost in the mail...the sender and I have been in communication so this is what makes the difference...but, anyway...she mailed the books when she was suppose to but, 3 weeks later she returns home from work only to discover this very same package of books sitting on her front porch.  She contacted me and offered me a book as an "I'm sorry" gift...remailed them, now with an even later postmark and it once again took them over 3 weeks to get here.

So, keep in mind there could be a legitimate reason for the postmark being late even though there is not a legitimate excuse for the sender not sending you a message.

Date Posted: 8/21/2008 7:56 AM ET
Member Since: 5/29/2007
Posts: 13,347
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I recently got one that was stamped 13 days after they said they mailed it.  It was both printed on the printed postage she bought at the PO, and hand stamped with the same date, so there's no getting around it, she mailed it 13 days later than she said she did.  I made that note to the team, but I doubt it matters.

I totally understand your frustration.

edited to say I probably wouldn't have said anything to the team if I had received a PM.  I understand life happens, so a note would have solved the whole problem.

Last Edited on: 8/21/08 11:07 AM ET - Total times edited: 1
Date Posted: 8/21/2008 8:17 AM ET
Member Since: 11/14/2005
Posts: 1,442
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This happened to me when the "13 ounce limit" went into effect. 

I put a 13.5 ounce book (with stamps, not PBS postage) into a blue mail box, a month before the official date of the "13 ounce limit in blue boxes" rule.  Two weeks later, the book appeared in my mailbox, enclosed in a plastic bag, with a note from the postmaster saying that any book over 13 oz. must be brought to the PO.  I was miffed, but also happy that they hadn't cancelled the stamps yet!  So I brought it to the post office and sent it out.  I PM'd the receiver, saying that I had marked the package as mailed two weeks prior, and explained the situation.  She was thankful for the PM.

Ultimately, she received the books and I was very grateful that she didn't enter the postmark date (as I did not get scolded by PBS about mailing late).

Date Posted: 8/21/2008 9:42 AM ET
Member Since: 8/23/2007
Posts: 26,510
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The only time I had books go lost on their way to me was when the sender gave them to her husband to mail.  He put them in the trunk of his car and forgot about them.  She found them 3wks later and promplty mailed them out.   But since this person didn't PM you that they were going to be late for some reason then they probably just forgot to mail them.  If they came back for some reason then they'd probably PM you.  I know sometimes people take a bunch of books to mail then find one under their seat or something sometime later.  They think they've mailed it but it's hiding in their car.  But she should have PM'd you.

Date Posted: 8/21/2008 10:44 AM ET
Member Since: 6/17/2008
Posts: 626
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It is annoying when people have marked books mailed and they haven't been....

But I do have a question... was the Postmark date August 15th or was it the actual postage sticker that was marked Aug. 15th.  If it was the postage sticker that was Aug. 15th, then it is obvious that the book wasn't mailed out until then.  But I have heard of cases on PBS where the person used pre-printed postage or something and DID mail the book on time, but that for whatever reason it sat around the PO for a month (or 2!)... and so it was the PO fault and it explained why the postmarked date was so late.  Could this have been the case?  I know it is rare but things like this do happen unfortunately...


Date Posted: 8/21/2008 11:06 AM ET
Member Since: 7/23/2007
Posts: 267
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Tammy, it was the postage sticker that had the 15th marked on it.

Date Posted: 8/21/2008 11:17 AM ET
Member Since: 6/17/2008
Posts: 626
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Ugh! So much for trying to give someone the benefit fo the doubt!  LOL  Just had to ask since that was pointed out to me one time when I had the same problem.

Yeah, that is really annoying... I am sorry you had to deal with that.  There have been times that I forgot (not by that long mind you! but by a couple of days) and I would feel so bad I sent out the book First Class. 

Date Posted: 8/21/2008 4:11 PM ET
Member Since: 1/25/2007
Posts: 6,567
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For those who count on family members to mail books it may help them to know about Paypal Shipping.

I have chronic health issues so I rarely drive (it's been months since I've drove) & I mail books from home.

I just wrap and package the book, weight it on a food scale & go to Paypal. You can easily print postage from there & I almsot always have money in my Paypal account thanks to selling stuff on Ebay so that helps cover the shipping fees.

After you print out the postage your just tape it on the package. My kids will put it in the mailbox for me, but I watch out the door to make sure it goes RIGHT into the mailbox with the flag up.

ONLY after that will I mark it mailed.

I use to depend on my husband to mail Ebay stuff but a few times he forgot and I felt bad having to tell the buyer it wouldn't be today like I said it would be tomorrow.

Now for bigger packages like a big Box O Books I'll have to get my husband mail it for me, but Paypal also allows package pick up where the mailman will take it for you.

Date Posted: 8/21/2008 4:22 PM ET
Member Since: 1/7/2006
Posts: 110
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I just want to add my story to the pile—I usually mark my books mailed when I am on my way out of the house to the PO, right when I package up the books—otherwise I can get a little scatterbrained and forget to mark them mailed when I get home.


Just recently, I had a bunch of packages to mail on one PO trip, and on the way, one of the books slipped under the seat of the car.  I had no idea until I found it there two weeks later—I felt terrible, and PMed the recipient to let her know why the book was late and that it was on its way.


All I’m saying is, it happens sometimes.  This is the first time I have ever mailed anything later than I marked it in nearly two hundred transactions, so it’s not like I make a habit of it.  But it happens!

Date Posted: 8/21/2008 5:35 PM ET
Member Since: 10/6/2005
Posts: 10,724
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I've had my post office forget to send along books I've mailed from the front counter. If they sit for more than 3 days, they have to put a new postage sticker on them at their expense. I had an entire box of books that they stuck under the front counter and forgot for almost a month. I don't know if they ever would have found them if they hadn't all "gone lost" at once so I went to see if I could find out what had happened - and there they were, still sitting at the post office!

Date Posted: 8/22/2008 6:10 AM ET
Member Since: 7/1/2008
Posts: 2,835
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Hmm, but the OP's problem sender said they were still sitting on her counter. OTOH, may be she was having some bad problems. Iw ould make a note or contact PBS. If it's a pattern, it needs to stop. if it's a fluke, we need to forgive.

BTW, if you have printed the postage and have several items, call the PO and just have them pick up the stuff at the door. They get credit for every bit of postage that is printed as coming from their zip codes, Usually your carrier won't mind. Mine even leaves little crates for me.