Discussion Forums - Questions about PaperBackSwap Questions about PaperBackSwap

Topic: Who do I contact when I've received a rude PM from a requestor?

Club rule - Please, if you cannot be courteous and respectful, do not post in this forum.
  Unlock Forum posting with Annual Membership.
Subject: Who do I contact when I've received a rude PM from a requestor?
Date Posted: 6/30/2008 7:42 PM ET
Member Since: 11/27/2006
Posts: 212
Back To Top

A requestor has complained that a book I sent her was in "damaged" condition.  I didn't think there was anything wrong with the book I sent her--I've received several in similar condition (and occasionally worse).  She obviously has a different opinion, which she expressed to me in a message with a tone that I found offensive. 

I understand being frustrated because a book isn't in as good a shape as what you thought it should be.  That's happened to me before.  And if she'd been polite when she PM'd me, I would have been more than willing to return her credit.  But she was very rude, and I'm disinclined to return the credit because I honestly didn't feel there was anything wrong with the book.

Sorry about the venting.  I will return the credit just to avoid having a bad mark on my record.  But before I do, I need to know:  who do I contact to complain about the PM she sent me?

Last Edited on: 6/30/08 7:52 PM ET - Total times edited: 1
Date Posted: 6/30/2008 8:07 PM ET
Member Since: 7/31/2007
Posts: 2,695
Back To Top

at the bottom of the page is a selection for Contact Us  click on that and you will be taken to a site where you can contact TPTB (the powers that be).

sorry you've had a bad experience.

Date Posted: 7/1/2008 12:57 AM ET
Member Since: 8/23/2007
Posts: 26,510
Back To Top

Was the book postable by PBS guidelines?  Just  because you received similar books from other PBS members doesn't mean it was postable. I would review the posting guidelines to be sure.  If the book meets all the guidelines and special requestor conditions (if there are any) then you don't need to give a credit back.  Of course I don't know what her complaint was and some people expect brand new books.  Even if it was technically unpostable there's no excuse for being rude.  Especially since you refunded the credit.  I would report it to PBS.  She'll get a friendly reminder to be nicer other members.  And one red mark isn't going to hurt your account.  It's when you have a bunch of them that you have to worry. 

Date Posted: 7/1/2008 5:27 AM ET
Member Since: 8/26/2006
Posts: 9,348
Back To Top

after clicking on the "contact us" link below, use the "feedback" option (not the e-mail)

L. G. (L)
Date Posted: 7/1/2008 7:40 AM ET
Member Since: 9/5/2005
Posts: 12,412
Back To Top

"Rude" is relative.  Unless she cursed at you or something, I wouldn't waste any time reporting it.


Date Posted: 7/1/2008 9:15 AM ET
Member Since: 11/27/2006
Posts: 212
Back To Top

After receiving her PM, I went back and reread the guidelines for posting books here.  The book, as far as I was concerned, met the posting standards.  Was it in perfect condition?  No.  It was an older book.  But it had no water damage, no tears, no marked pages.  If she wants a book in better condition than what I sent her, she has the option of using the "Requestor's Conditions" feature of this website.  And if she had, I probably wouldn't have sent her the book--I've turned down requests before when I haven't been sure the book would meet a person's standards, feeling it's better to be safe than sorry.  This requestor didn't have any conditions.

I did go ahead and e-mail the powers that be to let them know my feelings on the matter.  Maybe it'll be a waste of time, but I did it in the hopes that the next person she PM's about a problem doesn't get the same message I did.  She may not have used foul language in her PM, but there are far more polite ways of telling someone you're not happy with the book you received.

And tempting though it was to be as rude to her as she'd been to me, all I said to the requestor was that I was returning her credit.

Thanks for helping me out! :)

Date Posted: 7/1/2008 11:05 AM ET
Member Since: 9/13/2007
Posts: 2,520
Back To Top

Damaged is relative too. Unless she can state exactly what is wrong with the book that leads her to believe that it should not have been posted then I wouldn't refund the credit either.

Last Edited on: 7/1/08 11:05 AM ET - Total times edited: 1
Date Posted: 7/2/2008 3:50 PM ET
Member Since: 1/25/2007
Posts: 6,567
Back To Top

Go ahead and use the contact button and contact R&R (the people who run the site) about this person. I've done this in the past and they were able to look at the trail of messages we both sent. After that they agreed that the person was being very rude and I am sure they contacted them.

I sent the message after the person went on and on about my faith. There was no call for that.

Also sadly you will run into people who want books "better than new". I have even had a woman mail a book BACK to me with a note complaining about the shape of the book. The book was in very good shape and on the only problem I could see was a tad shelf wear and light pencil marks (they had been erased).

Some people are just very picky. If they are then they don't need to be on a  USED book site. lol

I agree I have gotten a few awful books from here but I just mark them recieved with a problem, KINDLY contact the sender about PBS's conditions & leave it that. Every time the person has returned my credit.

Again I think it all comes down to good old common sense. If you wouldn't want to get the book then don't post it. IF someone complains then tell them you are sorry and ask what you can do to fix the problem.

But again most of the world doesn't work on common senese. lol