"The process of learning requires not only hearing and applying but also forgetting and then remembering again." -- John Gray
John Gray (born 1951) is an American relationship counselor, lecturer and author. He has written seventeen books on relationships and personal growth, including his 1992 book Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus., which is being turned into a motion picture. Gray's most current book is Venus on Fire | Mars on Ice, an exploration of relationships and the role of food and nutrition to sustaining a healthy romantic partnership.
"A women under stress is not immediately concerned with finding solutions to her problems but rather seeks relief by expressing herself and being understood.""All men and women have an equal need for love. When these needs are not fulfilled it is easy to have our feelings hurt, for which we blame our partner.""Generally speaking, when a woman offers unsolicited advice or tries to help a man, she has no idea of how critical and unloving he may sound to him.""Just as women are afraid of receiving, men are afraid of giving.""Men are motivated and empowered when they feel needed. Women are motivated and empowered when they feel cherished.""To offer a man unsolicited advice is to presume that he doesn't know what to do or that he can't do it on his own.""When men and women are able to respect and accept their differences then love has a chance to blossom."
Gray was born in Houston, Texas. After graduating high school, Gray attended University of St. Thomas and the University of Texas without receiving any degrees. He did receive a bachelors and masters degrees in creative intelligence, though sources vary on whether these degrees were received from Maharishi European Research University (MERU) in Switzerland or from Maharishi International University in Iowa.
Gray received his Ph.D. from the unaccredited institution, Columbia Pacific University (CPU), after completing a correspondence course. CPU was closed by California court order in 2000. The court ruled that the State of California recognizes CPU degrees earned before June 25, 1997, as "legally valid" for use in the state, but other states, such as Texas, criminalize the use of CPU degrees. This time period above included Gray's degree which he received in 1982.
Gray's seventeen books have sold over fifty million copies and have been published in forty-five languages worldwide.
Gray wrote a nationally syndicated column with thirty million readers. His column appeared in The Atlanta Journal/Constitution, New York Daily News, New York Newsday, The Denver Post, and the San Antonio Express-News. Internationally, Gray's columns appeared in publications in England, Canada, Mexico, Korea, and in Latin American and the South Pacific.
Gray is a certified family therapist and a consulting editor for Family Journal.
Gray is an international expert in the field of communication and relationships. Gray has conducted public and private seminars for over 30 years. Gray is a speaker on the national and international lecture circuit.
Gray has made guest appearances on Oprah, Good Morning America, The Today Show, The CBS Morning Show, Live with Regis, The View, Politically Incorrect, Larry King Live, The Roseanne Show and CNN. Gray has been profiled in USA Today, Newsweek, Time Magazine, TV Guide, People and Forbes.
Gray is listed as a signer of the 9/11 Truth statement.
In 2001, Gray received the Smart Marriages Impact Award.
In 2007, Gray became the Brand founder of Mars Venus Coaching Franchise.
Critics have accused him of over-simplifying human psychology into stereotypes that fail to adequately describe many people. Communication scholars have published research-based rebuttals to Gray's claims. Other scholars, such as Deborah Tannen, a professor of linguistics, have also written research-based books that challenge some of Gray's claims.