I have read several parenting books and this is one of my favorites. The author focuses on what he calls "reality discipline" which, in my understanding, demonstrates that everybody, children included, make choices - the 'reality' of this understanding is that one must live with the consequences of our choices, whether good or bad. Thefore, Leman's approach is very simple - the child has a choice to behave or not to behave - if he behaves he reeps the rewards from you in the form of encouragement and incentives and if the decision is wrong, he reaps the punishments from you and/or the negative consequences of his choice. For example, the child who refuses to eat his meal will find that is his choice, but his dinner is then removed and thrown away and the parent will refuse any further food that evening to replace the missed dinner. The child finds that hunger is the reality of his choice.
The techniques DO work as long as the parent has the wherewithall to stick with the program, i.e. - not 'giving in' when the child is discovering that he/she does not like the choice they made!
Very good. highly recommended for all age groups of children, works as well for preschoolers as for teenagers. Truly teaches children the real-world implications of their behavior, which I believe is essential.
This book had some great ideas, but as with all help books, there were definitely spots where I thought the author had no clue what he was talking about. Mind you I was comparing HIS situations to ours. They didn't match up a lot. However, I did learn quite a bit and I'm sure it will definitely help in our home.
Foil finicky eaters, turn off temper tantrums, and minimize sibling rivalries. Get your children to be responsible and successful. Get kids to do what you want them to do. Know when to take the little buzzards by the beak. Understand why children misbehave and what to do about it. (Back Cover)