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The Eclectic Pen - Nanofiction 3

By: Paul H. (nessus19) - ,   + 43 more  
Date Submitted: 2/11/2007
Genre: Literature & Fiction » Short Stories & Anthologies
Words: 90

  I recall a time when the my senses weren't braided with fiber optic 'casings and my blood clot-free of the pulsing particulate from electronic messages. But I no longer remember what compelled me to embrace such a sterile body of content, or when the eyes of my jacked-in friends lost some of their color. This is no longer the controlled chaos of random signal and errant interpretation I loved so much. The air is rarified -- not from altitude, but amplitude -- and I feel my breathing room dwindle.

The Eclectic Pen » All Stories by Paul H. (nessus19) - ,

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Comments 1 to 3 of 3
Jim H. (Pecos45) - 2/12/2007 2:16 AM ET
This is stringing pseudo-intellectual sounding sentences together, Paul. It's NOT writing. Sorry.
Paul H. (nessus19) - , - 2/12/2007 9:29 AM ET
Dear Jim: Thank you for your perspective, Jim. A "pseudo-intellectual" quality some might ascribe to this piece is understandable, though this is not my intent -- and the words were carefully selected to reflect the feeling I wanted to communicate -- the imagery I wanted t share. And, of course, it IS writing...simply not the kind of writing you find accetable or palatable. However, I would agree with you if you feel it is not the kind of writing that should fall under the category "short story." Perhaps it is too fragmented even for microfiction. With a little tweaking, it might be more appropriate under the "poetry" category. Thanks for you comments.
ROBERT J. - 3/9/2007 11:18 AM ET
Exact, precise, perfect.
Comments 1 to 3 of 3