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The Eclectic Pen - Work in progress poem/illustrated children's book

By: Stuart M. (reinonmyday)   + 2 more  
Date Submitted: 12/25/2010
Genre: Children's Books » History
Words: 388

  what do you think of so far?

Once upon a time
a long time ago
something happened
and we think you should know.
Back then, the sun did not rise in the sky
alas, all it did was just roll by.

The people of China did not like the dark
the children would scream and the dogs would all bark

The men of china had an interesting thought
to solve their problem, it was a wall they sought.
The wall, they hoped, would keep the sun in
Just like the chicken house keeps in the hen.

But the men of china were like stubborn mules
They didn't work together, they acted like fools.
"I'll build a wall, just wait and see!"
"Wait, you're not any better than me!"
"I'll beat you!"
"I hate you!"
"Better watch out, I know kung fu."

The men, the men, they started to fight
They fought and they fought, well into the night
They finally stopped when they heard their moms call
But alas, they completely forgot the wall!

The women decided they needed some help
When they heard the men's cries and all of their yelps
"Those poor men, they're surely exhausted."
"They're sure to have chills, and be numbed, or frosted!"
"Lets do them a favor and finish the wall,
and when it is done it will be wide and so tall!"

(page showing the finished wall)

Now the fall is done, as far as we can see!
From the Gobi Desert, all the way to Korea!

That would have been it...if it weren't for the press.
They wanted the story, nothing more, nothing less.

"I'm a reporter and I'm very confused, I am here from the weekly news.
Look, sit down here and talk to me,
I wanna know how this wall came to be!"

(illustration of men huddled together)
"Look at this magnificent wall!
Should we tell them something, or nothing at all?"
"We can't let the women get all of the credit!"
"oh my gosh, you're right, you really said it!"
"we could tell them the wall popped out of the ground!"
"no, that wouldn't work...I don't like the sound."
"we could tell them the silk worm spun itself a wall!"
"no, no, that wouldn't work at all."
"we could tell them it was made to keep the sun in,
for now it must rise when the day does begin."
"or we can say we men built the whole thing!
to keep out or enemies, and protect the king."

...I'm not sure how I'm gonna end it, but that's what I have so far. What do you think?

The Eclectic Pen » All Stories by Stuart M. (reinonmyday)

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