Book Review of Bullet (Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter, Bk 19)

Bullet (Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter, Bk 19)
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Helpful Score: 9


I've been thinking for several days as to how I should review this book. I'm not an LKH-basher, even though I've been pretty tough on several of the last published novels. But in the end, I just have to go with how I feel.

Truth: I gagged my way through the first three chapters of BULLET, skimmed through a few more, and finally gave up. Some may say that reading only a few chapters of a book makes me incapable of writing a review, but I beg to differ. Let's begin....

The first chapter starts with Anita doing a favor for someone we've never heard of before. Said someone doesn't like Anita, Anita doesn't like her, and the only thing bringing them together is the need for a little boy's costume hat. Could have worked, except said five-year-old little boy wants to kiss Anita on the lips, like "all of the big boys do." The point? Even a little kid knows Anita is a whore. I apologize for the rough language, but please, let's call a spade a spade. It's gotten to the point where even CHILDREN in this series recognize that Anita Blake is nothing but a sex machine.

When the entire "ardeur" thing began, I went with it. I even understood the concept and reasoning behind it. But face it people - we've moved beyond Anita needing sex for power. She's now nothing more than a walking vagina. Anita Blake has sex because there's absolutely nothing else for her to do with ANY of the characters in this series! I've never met a character with such sex appeal. However Anita's doing it - making every single male and female (living or undead), want to have sex with her - she needs to bottle that up and sell it for a profit. She could not only have a "puppy pile," she could BUY a damn kennel!

And the sex? Puhleeease. Richard getting it on with Asher? Hello? Is this the same Richard who two books ago couldn't even stand to see Anita look at another guy, never mind know that she would no doubt end up having sex with them? I'm all for the male-male sex scene when the story calls for it, but there is no way in h-e-double-hockey-sticks that the REAL Richard would ever bring his naked body anywhere NEAR that of the scarred but deeply emotional Asher.

I could go on, but is there really a point? You're probably asking yourself why, if I'm so disgusted with the series, I continue to read it. And you would have a wonderful point, one that I've finally taken to heart. I WON'T be reading this series any longer. I've spent too much time waiting for it to get better - to be as good as the first four or five books - and realize now that my wait is pointless. It's not going to get better, ladies and gents. The downhill slide started a long time ago, and there is no hope for redemption as long as LKH continues to live out her Mary Sue fantasies through Anita Blake.

So, au revoir, Anita. It's been one heck of a ride, but this reader has finally come to her senses. After all, there are too many other decent books out there just waiting for me to read them. And just about anything else has got to be better than this.