By: Cami B. (psychoreader)
Date Submitted: 8/23/2009
Last Updated: 8/26/2009
Genre: Literature & Fiction » Poetry
Words: 95
Rating:

You pushed me around
knocked me down,
tore me apart,
trampled on my already broken heart.
You keep tellin' me "you'll come back baby,you'll see
you don't really wanna be free".

So I'll tell you what
I'll give you another shot.
You keep waitin'
I'll come back baby you'll see
on the second Tuesday of next week.

I'm strong,
wasn't wrong,
now your left alone
with your cold stone heart.
I keep tellin' you "I won't come back baby you'll see
I really wanna be free".

You keep tellin' yourself the lies
you try to make me beleive.
You keep waitin'
I'll come back baby you'll see
on the second Tuesday of next week.
Copyright@CamiBriley2008

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Comments 1 to 4 of 4

Jesse (EddyKrueger) - 8/24/2009 12:54 AM ET

This would make a good song. It has a verse/chorus/verse structure that gives the reading a certain rhythm. I loved it

Claudia (BrokenWing) - 8/24/2009 12:10 PM ET

I agree with the previous commenter. Had a nice meter to it and a sort of lyrical quality. I could see this as song lyrics. Clever concept for a poem. The Second Tuesday of next week = NEVER, but you've expressed this in a much more clever, poetic way. Something similar in concept to on the second full moon of next month, i.e. once in a blue moon. Thanks for sharing. Enjoyed it.

Marta J. (booksnob) - 8/24/2009 12:29 PM ET

I thought the same thing immediately--good song lyrics!

Susan C. (susan-s) - 9/15/2009 9:19 AM ET

I liked it and agree that it sounds like a song. I work with abused women and will share this with my group.

Comments 1 to 4 of 4

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