Berman was born in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, and raised in an affluent suburb in southern New Jersey. Berman realized by junior high school he was gay. Years later, Berman chronicled his first homosexual experience, which occurred while he was away at college, in the creative essay "Coming Out 101: Final Exam." Despite the title of this piece, Berman remained closeted from family and friends until after he graduated with his first undergraduate degree.

He attended first Tulane University, earning a Bachelor's degree in English literature, then later studied History at Rutgers-Camden campus in Camden, New Jersey as well as a Master's degree in Liberal Studies in 2006. He briefly worked in the publishing industry, both as a senior book buyer at an academic and then trade wholesaler, and in the marketing department of a small publisher in Philadelphia.

One of the most influential relationships in his life began through d8 Magazine, a shortly-lived periodical devoted to roleplaying gaming culture, when he met Holly Black. A few weeks later, Berman took an editorial assistant position with the medical publishing company Churchill Livingstone in New York City, where Black also, coincidentally, worked. The two developed a long and abiding friendship and remain critique partners to this day.

Berman is an active member of Science Fiction and Fantasy Writers of America (SFWA) and one of the few lifetime members of the RPGA (many of his early publications involved roleplaying games). Most of his short fiction could be considered dark fantasy or urban fantasy. He was a participant in the Nameless Workshop, based in the Philadelphia region, which includes such writers as Judith Berman, Victoria McManus, John Schoffstall, and Ann Zeddies.

He attended the Clarion East 2006 class, the last year that workshop was held in East Lansing, Michigan.

Though raised Jewish, Berman wavers in his belief between secular Judaism and Agnosticism. He sits on the Advisory Council for the White Crane Institute.

As of January 2007, he has sold nearly 80 articles and short stories, many of them dealing with queer speculative fiction. Several of his urban fantasy stories are set in the Fallen Area. Berman has been a finalist seven times for the Gaylactic Spectrum Awards and twice for the Lambda Literary Award. His first novel, Vintage: A Ghost Story was released in 2007 and was a finalist for the Andre Norton Award. In June 2009, he launched the quarterly publication, Icarus, the Magazine of Gay Speculative Fiction (see Icarus ).